Building a New Life
by MelanthiaChase
Summary: A/U This is a speculative work based upon how events could turn out after Season 5. Milla has lost everything but after ten years of struggle and hard work she's finally happy with a man she's loved since she was thirteen and the family they've raised together. Mentions of Juice/Milla but dominant pairing of Chibs/Milla. Spoilers for Season 5 and mention of character death.
1. Building a New Life

**I own nothing you recognize. All original characters and storylines are my own.**

**!Warning!** _Mentions of events in Season 5. Character Death._ **!Warning!**

**Building a New Life**

"Esperanza Telford!" The yell of her name caused Espy to look up from the face of the young boy she was pummeling. She curled her lip as the aide walked up and gave her a stern look. "Get up!"

Esperanza capitulated but kicked the boy's side as she stood. She gave the aide another withering look before she followed her in with the boy being led ahead of her. She continued to glare as she was seated in the principal's waiting room while Mark was led to the nurses office. She could hear him crying and caterwauling and smirked. The little bitch couldn't even take a punch. Uncle Phil would've wiped the floor with the little turd. She waited for a long time, they were probably trying to make her nervous so she'd spill everything, she snorted, a Telford didn't rat. She got bored and started playing with her watch when there was an amused chuckle from the doorway. She looked up and grinned when she saw her Daddy in the doorway.

"What've ya done now darlin'?" Chibs asked his erstwhile daughter who raised an eyebrow but answered her Father.

"I just put a kid in his place." She said as she crossed her arms and Chibs walked over and sat next to her.

"What he do ta piss ya off Espy?" He asked and saw her jaw tighten and she didn't want to rat but telling her Dad was different.

"He called Robby a nigger." She said softly and Chibs blew out a breath but her story wasn't done. "He said Mom probably didn't know who his Daddy was."

As Espy wiped a tear from her cheek Chibs put an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. He placed a kiss on the top of her head before he rested his against hers.

"We know who his Daddy was...who my Daddy was." She said quietly and Chibs looked away for a second. She was right, they all knew who their Daddy was but only Chibs, Phil and Hap knew where his ashes had been dumped. Shaking his head he squeezed her tight. Just then the principal's secretary came into the room and ushered them into his office. Chibs kept a grip on his girl's shoulder as they followed behind.

…

"Yer lucky yer Ma's at work." Chibs said as they left the office and Espy just stared darkly ahead. She'd been given two days in-school suspension for the fight and was pissed. She was just defending her brother and mother. She should get a reward, not a punishment. Chibs reached down and grabbed her hand and she gripped him tightly. "Get yer stuff, we'll go to lunch then head home. I think Milla bought some cookie dough, ya can make it when we get there."

Espy didn't say anything, only nodded and Chibs sighed. She was so much like her Father and she didn't even know it. Suffering in silence was Juice's thing and she'd inherited that trait. She stayed mostly silent during the meal and only answered what needed to be answered. He gave up once he finished his meal and had hers boxed up before he brought her home and Espy walked past him and he heard her footsteps go upstairs as he went in the kitchen to put a pot of water on the boil for tea, if she wasn't going to talk it was going to be a long afternoon. As he took out the tea canister and infuser the house phone rang and he checked the caller id before he picked it up.

"Hullo Lovely." He smiled, he knew it had to be his wife on the phone.

"Hey, I got a call from the school saying Espy was in a fight and that you took her home. Is she ok?" He chuckled at the concern in Milla's voice as he answered.

"Aye, she's good, jus' a wee bit moody. She's fine physically but she took a hell of a wollop emotionally. The little shite called Robby a nigger and you a whore. Espy wasn't goin ta stand fer that." He explained and he heard Milla take a deep breath.

"Shit, what's the punishment?" She asked and he took a cigarette out of his pack and lit up before he answered.

"Two days in school suspension. They're not puttin it on 'er record. It's goin ta be alright lovely." He placated his wife and heard her sigh into the phone.

"Thank you so much for getting her. This list of repos was as long as my leg, I swear to god." Chibs chuckled as she grumbled. She hated working in the office but with the studio on hiatus and with Chantal about to pop any day they needed her to take charge of the office.

"Ya gonna come home when it's done?" He asked, happy he was home and not at the garage.

"Actually we're going to cut the repos short today. The winch is shot on the wrecker so that needs to be repaired. I should be home in an hour or two, after I pick up Mauve from Mrs. Lindstrom's." She detailed her plan and his smile widened at the mention of their baby girl.

"I could go pick up Mauve if ya want. Espy wouldn't mind gettin outta tha house." He told her as the teapot whistled and he removed it from the burner.

"Don't worry about it Babe, I have to pay Mrs. Lindstrom for the week anyway. Give Espy a hug from me and let her know she's not in trouble. I'll call after I leave Mrs. Lindstrom's. Love you." He could hear the smile in her voice and answered with his own.

"Love you too." He said as he hung up then went to brew the tea he was making. "Esperanza! Come downstairs, now!"

…

Chibs sat at the kitchen table and drank his tea as Esperanza baked cookies. He looked around at the bright kitchen and found himself smiling in appreciation. The kitchen had been a labor of love when they'd moved into the house. It, along with the rest of the house, had the distinct "Gemma" feel to it and neither he nor Milla could live in the house and be constantly reminded of the shit that went down. Looking down at the scar on his hand he said a silent prayer for the souls of Jax and Gemma and condemned Clay to the Hell he was burning in in the same breath. If it weren't for the old bastard so many of his brothers would be alive right now instead of dead and rotting in the ground. Shaking his head he looked and saw Espy looking at him.

"Are you ok Da?" She asked him and he smiled at the small accent that carried through her voice, a bit of Scot in that Puerto Rican face.

"I'm fine wee one. Just thinkin about all the good times in this kitchen." She smiled back and resumed her cookie making. He felt his smile widened. Get Espy in a kitchen and she was happy, she was a lot like her Mom in that way.

"Remember when Mom made Kenny the costume and the whole counter was dyed red, because she used the wrong blood?" She chuckled and smiled big while Chibs guffawed. Aye he remembered. The counter still had a pink tinge to this day.

I remember it all Darlin'." He smiled at his daughter and got lost in thought. Yes he did remember it all.

…

Ten years ago he never would have thought that he'd be married with four children, let alone married to Milla. If he were honest he didn't think he'd be alive at this time ten years ago. Alive he was though and President of SAMCRO, he earned his patch putting out fires and bringing the Club back together after the final swathe of destruction Clay set into motion. His blood boiled, even ten years later, as he thought of the ambush Clay had set up for Jax, Gemma, Tara and anyone loyal to Jax. Luckily he and Tara had managed to escape, along with Hap and Phil but everyone else met their maker at the hands of Clay and his puppets. No one imagined an old, fragile man like him still had the power and command he did but he proved them wrong and Jax, Gemma and Bobby paid the price while Tara got the fuck out of Dodge that night with the kids and never turned back. Chibs was glad she did, he didn't want the Club and the town to swallow her up and drown her in bitterness. She was free and for ten years had stayed that way, not setting foot in Charming again.

After the ambush Clay was in the wind, along with Juice and several Sons from other Charters who remained loyal to the one time Pres. Tig had already been killed by Pope's crew in an act of sacrifice but Chibs knew he would have been on their side in the conflict. While Clay and his crew escaped Chibs regrouped and took leadership of the Club. He managed to put out fires and keep everyone sane until the time came for vengeance and that vengeance came swiftly after they'd discovered where Clay was hiding out. One night Chibs, along with the remaining members of SAMCRO and several brothers from Tacoma and SAMTAZ had their own ambush and burned down the house they were shacking up in, shooting any brother that came out the door until the only ones left were Clay and Juice who rushed out. They were relieved until they saw the bodies lying around them and the semi-circle of armed Sons pointing their weapons. Juice started apologizing, saying it was a mistake while Clay tried to use loyalty. They were having none of it and loaded the survivors into the back of the van. Juice continued to cry and blubber, saying they couldn't kill him. He had a wife and two children, they couldn't take him from Milla. Chibs heart hurt as he thought about the poor young woman who had lost so much and was about to lose everything. Still, Juice was a traitor, a liar and, as they soon learned through torture, a rat. His fate was sealed and he came to grips with that and remained coherent long enough to get Chibs to take responsibility for his family. He wanted Chibs to take care of Milla, make her his woman. Chibs agreed and sent Juice off to his final rest with a bullet to the head and a clear conscience.

Though his conscience was clean he still felt pain and heartache when he pulled into Milla's driveway that night. She had known about Juice's betrayal and knew what they were going to do but she was not ready to hear it and collapsed into Chibs' arms when he told her. While she wept he held her and when her tears turned to violence and she hit him as hard and fast as she could, he held her until she went still. After that he went to his brothers and they burned Clay and Juice together in the same pit, burying the ashes under a load of concrete that became the foundation for a storage unit. In the end they wound up contributing to the Club in their own way.

After the deaths and near destruction of the Club Chibs found himself responsible for holding the Club together and taking care of Juice's family. At two Esperanza was a hellion who ran Milla ragged and Milla was overwhelmed as she found herself raising four children alone. She had Espy, Robby, Kenny and Ellie to raise and didn't have the money or room to do it. Chibs did what he could to help her get her life back on track. She had a difficult time reconciling everything Juice was to her with the traitorous rat that had been exterminated but she didn't let the grief consume her and Chibs was still proud of her for her strength all these years later.

Chibs and Milla learned to work together and formed a household that worked. He became her rock and held her up when things looked bleak and she did the same for him. Once her inheritance came through she moved her family into the house that once belonged to her parents and invited Chibs to move with them. He agreed and they created a strong family but there was still a distance between them. She could forgive him for doing his duty and appreciated everything he did for her and her babies but at the back of her mind he was still the man who killed her husband. Chibs accepted this but did whatever he could to prove he was there for her and the kids. During their time together Chibs found himself falling in love with her and, unbeknownst to him, she was falling in love as well but her heart was too damaged to make the leap and tell him how she felt. It took two years of living in silence before the inevitable happened. Chibs smiled as he thought about the first time he and Milla made love. They were doing the dishes after all of the kids had gone to bed and Milla slipped on her way to the sink. Chibs grabbed her before she fell and as he stood with her in his arms he couldn't stop himself as he brought his lips to hers. That was it, two years of pent up frustration and sexual tension erupted and he made love to her on the counter. He would never forget the look of need and desire on her face for as long as he lived. Hell, he still brought out the memory when he needed to beat off, it as too good to ignore. It would've been nice to say that this brought them together but that would be a lie. It took some time for him to break down her walls but it happened and they were able to bring their relationship to a new level of intimacy and both were truly happy for the first time in years. They had a strong family, a strong relationship and the Club was starting to get back on it's feet after years of scrambling and reorganization. Life seemed to be back to normal, or as normal as it ever got.

After years of living in relative bliss a wrench was thrown into their lives when Milla wound up pregnant. They were happy but Chibs wanted more, he wanted to make an honest woman of her. She managed to dodge him whenever he brought it up but eventually he found his way to Ireland and after many tears and a nearly endless talk Fiona agreed to divorce him. Elated, he went home only to find Milla in the hospital. She'd miscarried the child. He thought it would be the end of their relationship, her guilt and pain were overwhelming her but she surprised him by clinging to him and the situation ended up making them stronger. Milla still refused to marry him, she didn't want to lose him like she'd lost Juice. The intimacy of marriage would make it worse and she knew she wouldn't survive losing him. He was her dream come true.

Her resistance came crashing down when she found herself pregnant again. This time the baby was planned and she was in love with it from the moment she knew. She agreed to marry Chibs and they were married before a Justice of the Peace with Phil and Chantal as their only witnesses. Milla was truly happy and when Mauve Gloria Telford was born she felt like her life was complete.

Occasionally she'd find herself breaking down as she remembered her parents or Juice or even Jax but Chibs was there to pull her up again and the Club became a source of strength like it had always been in the past and now that they weren't running guns or muling drugs they were well under the radar. Chibs had managed to pull them from the quagmire and with several sound business decisions had brought the Sons back in the black. He also took his position as President of the Mother Charter seriously and showed to be a great leader, as strong and powerful as Clay and smart as Jax but with a hardness bred from years in the True IRA and a sense of fairness that was appreciated by his men. He was the King and Milla was his Queen.

As he thought of his lady he heard the door open and stood while Espy went into the living room. He followed behind and grinned as his youngest daughter let go of her Mother's hand and flew into his arms. She placed a loud wet kiss on his cheek and he returned the favor, causing her to giggle. While he bonded with his girl Milla sent Robby to put his bag away and folded Espy in her arms. She was proud of her child for defending the family like she did and wanted her to know it.

"Hey babygirl. Heard school didn't go well today." She said softly and Esperanza shook her head.

"I'm sorry I got in the fight Mom, I know "brains before bullets'." She said and Milla chuckled before she leaned down to kiss her eldest daughter's hair.

"Don't be sorry, you did well." She kissed Espy's head again before she moved away and made sure Espy's eyes met her. "Now, I heard you wanted to get that new coat at the boutique. I think we should go for a trip tomorrow to get it for you. I might even get something for myself."

Milla smiled at her daughter but quickly looked up to give Chibs a wink. There was a babydoll nighty that she knew he'd appreciate. She'd just have to get it while Espy tried on clothes.

"Thanks Mom!" Espy said, excited, before she moved and ran back into the kitchen to check on her cookies.

"I was thinkin we could order pizza tonight. Ellie's stoppin by with her boyfriend and I don't want him thinking he's special." Milla said darkly and Chibs just nodded. Ellie thought he and the Sons would be a problem when she started dating but, no, it was her overprotective mambear that chased them away and he couldn't be happier about that. It saved him the trouble of handling them himself.

"Sounds good, Kenny's still at football practice. He'll be headin home after." He said before he set Mauve down and chuckled as she made a beeline for her toys and took out the replica Dyna he'd gotten her, her favorite toy.

"Good, I love it when the family's together." She grinned before she crossed the floor and Chibs wrapped his arms around her.

"Aye and I love you." He kissed her but let go when Robby walked back into the room.

"Ew, gross." They pulled apart and laughed before Chibs ducked in for another kiss. If you couldn't mess with your kid, who could you mess with?"

…

"God today was a long day." Milla said as she climbed into bed and moaned as the mattress molded around her. Chibs ran a hand through her hair as he continued to watch Storage Wars. If those fools ever went to Reaper Storage he'd kick their asses out. He smirked at the thought before he looked down at his wife and moved his hand to her swollen stomach. At seven months his boy was a big one, he stretched his mother to the limits and Chibs loved seeing Milla grow and glow as the pregnancy progressed.

"Ya feelin' ok darlin'?" He asked and Milla nodded before she looked at him with a naughty glint in her eye.

"I'd feel better if those hands moved lower." He smirked before he got out of the bed and locked their bedroom door. His wife wanted some loving and he'd be damned if he refused her.

…

"I love you." Milla whispered as Chibs kissed her head lightly and ran his hand along her stomach. After the lovemaking they'd decided to spoon and Milla was glad, she needed the closeness.

"I love ya too, now sleep. Another busy day tomorrow." Milla complied and Chibs held her tighter. They'd had a long and winding road to get to where they were but he wouldn't change it. Every pitfall they face made them stronger and brought them closer. He chuckled as he remembered the awkward thirteen year old girl who told him she loved him in her Dad's workshop. He never imagined that he'd be holding that young woman in his arms, her dreams coming true but here he was and he couldn't be happier about it.

* * *

...

* * *

**Author's Note**: I had this story on my computer for a long time and lately I've been speculating about what Milla will do when they find out Juice is a rat and deal with it accordingly. This story sprung from this speculation and has been adapted based upon situations in Season 5. It comes from the fact that I believe Chibs is the "Horatio" in the Hamletesque world Sutter has created [originally I had Opie pegged as the Horatio...we all know how that turned out :( ] As such Chibs is the survivor who brings everyone back from the grand tragedy in one piece and stronger than ever. I have a few other speculative pieces worked up with this pairing, a further exploration of this story and am willing to share one or two if there's an interest. Please let me know what you think.


	2. Bleak

**I own nothing you recognize. All original characters belong to me with the exception of Gillian who belongs to the wonderful _Superdani_. All storylines are my own as well.**

**Bleak**

Milla shook as she sat in her van. She needed to get away from it all, her pain, loneliness and suffering for a little while. She was no good for the kids in the state she was in and she needed to get her head straight so she could go home to them. There were times when she thought about sending them up north to Tacoma with Koz and Gillian for a while or Portland with Desiree and Looney but she couldn't do that. She couldn't ship them off because she was having a tough time, couldn't abandon them. She wasn't that kind of person. She dealt with her shit head on...it was the Morrow way. Her heart hurt as she thought about Clay, dead in an unmarked grave, covered in concrete while his ashes blended with her husband's permanently. She wasn't supposed to know the details but Phil pitied her and loved her family enough that he told her and even drove by the location so she could see. Tears filled her eyes as she looked at the temporary storage unit in front of her, a hastily constructed building made of corrugated tin and slats of plywood. Fittingly ramshackle to show their disdain for what was beneath.

After she took a deep breath Milla got out of the van and walked toward the structure, her feet getting slower as her heart got heavier. Once she stood at the door, which was nothing more than a long sheet of plywood with some hinges, she felt her heart beat a steady tattoo in her throat as it went dry. As she breathed heavily she opened the door and stepped inside. As the door closed behind her she stood still for a few torturous moments in the silence that seemed to echo screams she knew were just in her head. The screams of her father and the man that she'd pledged her heart, body and soul to, screams that she knew were long done before Happy and Chibs poured gas on their cold bodies and lit the match. She closed her eyes as she thought of the flames engulfing them. Juice's lightning bolts crackling and tearing as the heat of the flames split his skin then turning his flesh black, blotting out two vivid markers of his love for her. Clay's blue eyes popping from the furnace-like heat as he was immolated. The two most important men in her life taken from her forever in the cleansing fire, erasing them from her future, but still leaving them dominating her past.

Sobs ripped from her throat as she walked further into the small building, her legs taking her to the place where her heart heaved. She knew it was the spot where they were burned. She knew it was their final resting place. She stood in the spot and felt the strngth leave her legs. She managed to fall gracefully to the floor and lay there, sobbing as she pillowed her head in her hands.

"Why did you do it?" She asked the ashes of her former lover, best friend and husband, the father of her children and breaker of her heart. "Why did you go that far? We loved you, Jax loved you, Mom loved you. Why'd you throw it all away? We needed you and you turned away from us. We loved you!"

She shouted in a keening voice before she sat up and hit the floor, her sobbing giving way to anger. She continued to hit the floor until the skin on her hands split and her hands went numb. Soon Milla grew tired and collapsed to the floor again, this time pressing her head against the cold concrete.

"Did you love me...in the end?" She asked quietly, in a voice ravaged by pain and tears. "We drifted so far apart, there were so many secrets, so many lies. You could've told me anything baby. I would've forgiven you. I did forgive you for so much and you repaid me by becoming Clay's puppet, he held your strings and you danced for him. Did you think about what his plans would mean for us, our children? Robby will never know you and Espy will forget you, did you think about that? You were everything to me baby and I still love you. I know they say I should forget you, a rat and traitor but I can't. You were everything to me and I can't let that go. I love you baby."

She felt tears slip from her eyes and roll down her face as she closed her eyes. She had so much to say, her words tumbling together in her head, fighting for dominance. She realized she'd never be able to say everything in her mind, everything in her heart so she just laid there crying, the cold from the concrete seeping into her bones. The cold became soothing and she felt herself falling asleep but at the last moment before she lost consciousness her eyes opened wide and she sat up. She couldn't sleep, she had to get home and read to Espy. She needed to work on Ellie's costume for the play and cook dinner and feed Robby. As tempting as it would be to just lie there and let darkness come for her she couldn't do it. She couldn't abandon her kids.

On joints made sore by the cold she rose and stared down at the spot she rested, her tears were being absorbed into the concrete. She liked to think they'd bond with Juice's ashes. Taking a deep breath she turned and walked toward the door before a thought came to her and she turned back and stood at the final resting place again. She kissed her fingertips and knelt down.

"Goodbye Juice, I'll always love you." She pressed her fingertips to the concrete before she stood and spit on the ground her eyes full of malice.

"Burn in hell Clay." She glared then took another deep breath before she walked out of the building.

...

"Hey." Milla greeted Chantal when she walked through the door. She'd been good enough to watch the kids while Milla had her alone time.

"Hey, Ellie's playing with Espy in the living room, Robby's napping and Kenny's playing video games in the bedroom downstairs. Phil set up a tv and XBox downstairs for him." Chantal gave her the status update before she stood and hugged her best friend. "How are you? Did you do what you needed to."

"Yeah, I think I can start to heal now. Thank you so much for watching the kids. Did you...did you clean out the bedroom?" Milla asked, her voice choked with fear as she pulled away from her best friend. She hadn't been in her bedroom since the night Chibs informed her her husband was a traitor. She couldn't sleep in sheets that held his scent or see his clothes folded neatly on the chair by his closet. It killed her to go in there.

"No, it's something you need to do. I'll spend the night here with you and we can do it together, after the kids go to sleep." She pulled Milla into her arms again and whispered in her ear. "You'll get through this. I'll be with you every step of the way."

"I love you." Milla whispered as she cried into Chantal's shoulder and Chantal held her closer.

"I love you too." She kissed Milla's head and continued to hold her, she'd meant every word.

…

Milla took a deep breath as she opened Juice's closet. His clothes and shoes were still there, hung and his shoes neatly placed on the floor. Her breath caught in her throat when she saw his stash box behind his shoes, filled with various kinds of weed and other goodies he'd taken up over the last year. She picked it up and without thinking went into the bathroom and emptied each baggy and packet into the toilet. She flushed whenever it looked like there was too much and didn't stop until the box was empty. Once that was done she breathed easier and walked into the bedroom where she stopped in her tracks.

"What are you doing here?" Milla asked the interloper who remained standing by the bed.

"Chanty said you were in 'ere. She needed to go do somethin fer Phil and didn wan' ya ta be alone. I just thought I'd keep ya company, help ya with shit." Chibs said and Milla just nodded and walked past him.

"There are boxes in the corner there. You can put the stuff I hand you in those." She directed and went to the closet where she stood stock still for a moment, frozen, she didn't know where to start. As she started shaking Chibs came up behind her and place his hands gently on her shoulders.

"Come on Milla, I'll do this. Jus' sit on the bed and put it in boxes." He guided her to the bed and sat her down on the edge. "Here ya are darlin'."

He placed a box in front of her and went to the closet. They worked together in silence, Chibs taking the clothes off their hangers and Milla placing the clothes in the boxes. It went smoothly until Chibs took out a black button-up shirt with sharp creases. When he handed it to Milla he heard her gasp then watched as tears came swiftly out of her eyes. He was afraid of this.

"Milla, wha's happening?" He asked and Milla took a shaky breath.

"Juice wore this at our wedding. The pinstripes matched my dress." She said quietly as she ran her hand over the fabric. "I didn't know he still had this."

"I remember that day. Only seen ya happier twice." Chibs said as he walked from the closet and knelt by Milla who looked at him with tearfilled eyes.

"I can't do this...Chibs I can't." Milla started to cry in earnest and he moved so he was sitting next to her on the bed and he took her in his arms.

"I know it's hard darlin' but yeh've gotta do it." He consoled her as he placed a kiss to the top of her head. "I'll be here every step o' the way."

Milla nodded and took several deep breaths as she composed herself. She knew this was going to be hard but she never realized that one shirt could reduce her to a blubbering mass. She wiped her eyes before she looked at Chibs and cleared her throat.

"Chibs?" She asked and he moved away as he looked at her.

"What darlin'?" He asked as he rested his head on hers.

"Did Juice say anything before...before you did it?" She asked, not thinking he'd answer but wishing

Chibs debated telling her the truth. Milla deserved to know that her husband's last thoughts were about her, at the same time he didn't want to bring her to a darker place. His decision was made when Milla gripped the collar of his cut and looked into his eyes.

"I need to know, please Chibs, I need this." Tears continued to pour from her eyes and Chibs put his hands over hers.

"He said a lot of things Milla, he apologized for what he did an' he made me promise ta take care of ya', ta make ya mine." He saw a look of disbelief enter her eyes but he continued. "He wanted ta make sure ya were gonna be fine. He wanted ya ta have help an' I agreed. I promised him I'd take care a' ya an that's what I'm doin. I'm not goin' anywhere."

"Is that the only reason you're here?" She asked in a quiet voice.

"Ya know better than that darlin'," He told her, his eyes hard and serious, before he took her hands from his cut and held them.

"Will you help me finish this?" Milla asked, not wanting to think about the promises Chibs made and what they meant for her.

"O' course." Chibs let go of her hands and stood. He walked over to the closet and resumed packing it up. He took out one of Juice's work shirts and placed it in a box before Milla could see. She was holding on by a thread and it was now his job to make sure the thread didn't snap.

**…**

"Tha's it, the room's clean." Chibs announced as he taped the last box closed and Milla sat on her chair in the corner, staring at a picture.

"Thanks." She ran her fingertips over the picture and Chibs wandered over. When he saw the image he grimaced. He couldn't let her keep it.

"Milla-" He started but she quickly clutched the picture to her chest and shook her head.

"No! You can't take this! This is the first picture we ever took as a family!" Her voice was high and panicked and Chibs knelt in front of her.

"He's wearin' his cut darlin. You know all those pictures have ta be burnt, he was a traitor and a rat." He said kindly and Milla gave him a desperate look.

"He was my husband! I can't just throw him away, I can't get rid of him!" Her eyes turned wide and crazy while Chibs placed his hand on her leg.

"Alright darlin', we'll talk about it later." He watched some of the craziness leak from her eyes and she nodded.

"Thank you." She whispered as she looked at the picture and ran her fingertip along her husband's face.

Chibs took a deep breath and stood, cracking his back and groaning. He'd worked too hard that day and he was exhausted.

"You can sleep on the couch if you want. I think I'm going to try to sleep here tonight." Milla said absently as she kept her eyes trained on the picture. Chibs just nodded and looked at her sadly.

"Alright, get some rest and I'll see ya in the mornin'." Chibs said quietly before he walked to Milla and kissed her forehead. "Don't forget that I love ya, that's why I agreed ta take care a' ya an' that's not gonna change."

Milla looked at him and swallowed the lump in her throat before she spoke.

"I don't know how I feel about you anymore." Her voice was quiet and Chibs ran a hand through her hair as he stood.

"I reckon it'll be like that fer a while, but it doesn' change how I feel. Get some sleep. We'll talk in tha' mornin'." He told Milla and she nodded as he walked out the door.

While Chibs slept Milla took a marker to the picture and blacked out Juice's cut and Ink, leaving nothing in the picture that referenced the Club. She understood Chibs' reasons and even sympathized with him as the new President of a fractured Club. He couldn't make any exceptions to the rules so she took a risk defying him, but she couldn't allow the picture to be destroyed. It was the last truly good thing that came from her relationship with Juice and she couldn't lose it. Once the ink dried Milla kissed the picture then placed the picture on her nightstand. He may have been a traitor and a rat but he'd also been her man and she would never forget that. She just hoped Chibs would understand.

…

The next morning Chibs woke up before Milla and entered the bedroom, intent on taking the picture while she slept. He crept to the bed and was surprised to find the picture out in the open, but was even more surprised to find Juice's ink and cut blacked out. It made him smile, his girl was always so smart and understood the Club so well she knew just what to do to preserve the picture. At the thought he started, "his girl" when did she become that? He set the picture back down and watched Milla sleep for a few minutes before he brushed some hair out of her face. He didn't know when he started thinking of her as his girl but he sure as hell knew it was right. She was his now and he was going to do whatever he could for her.

* * *

…

* * *

**Author's Note:** I've decided to continue these AU's. I know that many of you can't imagine Milla with anyone but Juice and I have to agree with your assessment. I love Juice too much but that's the reason I have to explore these 'what ifs', I need to stay fresh and work outside of my comfort zone. It's because I want to be the best writer I can. That desire keeps these stories churning in my head. This collection won't be a long one but I know I have to continue on in order to push myself to new boundaries and take my characters to places I haven't taken them before. Thank you all for reading and reviewing. I appreciate it more than you know.


	3. Making a Home

**I own nothing you recognize. All original character and storylines are my own.**

**Making a Home**

"Ya can do this. I'll be with ya every step." Chibs said as he stood behind Milla as she shakily brought the key to the lock of what had once been her parents' front door. It slid in easily, but slid out again when her shaking got out of control. This was her fourth attempt to open the door and, while he was frustrated, Chibs made no move to open it himself. He knew she would never heal if he did it for her.

Milla tightened her jaw and ground her teeth as she tried again. She was being a pussy and she knew it. This was going to be the best thing for her family and she knew it. The house was huge with plenty of room for the big family and it truly was hers so it shouldn't have been as big of a deal as it was but her hands were not cooperating. She couldn't focus, could barely move and the solution to the problem came to her but she couldn't ask him to do what she needed, to put her head on straight. After the key shook from the lock, once, twice more she got fed up and spoke without taking her eyes from the door.

"Pull my hair Chibs." She requested in a voice so quiet he was sure he didn't hear her.

"What?" He asked, hoping he was wrong.

"Pull my hair, pinch me, slap me, do anything to force me to focus. Whenever I'd go numb or hurt so badly I could barely breathe pain always snapped me out of it. Please...it's the only way I can do this." She pleaded as she turned and Chibs saw the desperation in her eyes.

"I can't hurt ya. I'm supposed ta protect ya." He answered back and she took a deep breath.

"I know it's not right and I know it's not healthy but it's the only way I've managed to cope all these years. Remember how I was after Donna died? After Ope? Remember the bruises everyone could see but no one mentioned. Juice gave me those because I needed that pain, needed the focus it gave me. Chibs you took him from me, don't take away my sanity. I know I'm asking alot but I need this." Her voice took on a calm tone and Chibs nodded. He understood and he did remember. He remembered how she'd press the bruises, pinch them to make the pain sharp. She was right, it was wrong, wasn't healthy but if a little pain could take a lot of weight off her heart he could do it.

He stared hard into her eyes as he brought his hand up and took hold of her hair. Still staring he first tugged gently then, taking in the plea in her eyes, pulled sharply causing Milla to gasp and he saw a bit more focus and lucidity enter her eyes.

"Thank you." She whispered then once his hand left her hair she turned and opened the door. She was no longer shaking and strode into the dark entryway. She turned on a light and stood still as she looked at the space around her. Chibs poked her side and she started to move forward. Chibs decided to take the lead and walked into the living room, turning on the light as he passed and moved ahead while Milla stopped again and looked at the pictures on the wall. There was so much history on the walls, all Milla wanted to do was tear them down.

While she picked up picture after picture Chibs went through the house and turned on lights, marveling at how everything seemed untouched despite the stickers that were put on by the lawyers to denote ownership. He wondered why they even bothered since everything was left to Milla, except for a trust fund in each grandchild's name that would become available when they turned eighteen. Once the house was lit up he went back and found Milla in the same position he'd left her in so he walked up to her and put a hand on her shoulder, hurt when she jerked away.

"What d'ya wanna do Milla?" He asked, his voice catching a bit as he thought of how much life and love used to echo throughout the house, now it was silent as the grave.

"What I want to do is burn the house to the ground with everything in it." She said but before Chibs could talk about it she continued. "What I'm going to do is clean out all of Ma's things and Jax's, send Jax's stuff to Tara and sell anything I don't need. Once everything non-essential is cleaned out I'm going to sell it and split the profits between my household, Tara's and the Club. What do you think, Pres?"

"You don' owe the Club anything Milla. Just take what ya need for the family. What about the house?" He looked around at the large space. It would be perfect for the family. The kids could each get their own room and she'd have plenty of space to write and work.

"We'll be moving in once it's cleared out. There's no room in my house anymore." She said sadly and Chibs nodded. Her house was far too crowded.

"That's a good plan. What do ya wanna do tonight?" He asked and Milla walked to the couch and sat on the arm of the chair.

"I just want to look around, but first I need to sit a while." She got up and moved to the couch. "Will you sit with me?"

"Aye, I'll sit with you." He took the seat next to her on the couch and sat with her while she breathed deeply and found some sense of calm. They stayed there for a long time before Milla stood and walked around the room. So much history to take in, so much pain.

…

It took two months for Milla and her family to be ready for the move into her parents' old home. Chibs had gotten brothers from several charters to clear out the house and repaint everything. It helped Milla a lot and he was glad he had the idea, a fresh coat of paint created a clean state of mind. They'd also sold all of the unnecessary items and made a tidy profit which, as she promised, Milla split three ways. Chibs never told her but the money she'd given to the Club was used to make the house inhabitable again. It was the least he could do since he'd helped to turn her world upside down. He just wished it would be enough but knew that no matter what he did it never would be and Milla would never be like she was before. Other than helping Milla with the house he also used his position as President to make the sale of her old house go smoothly, since Phil and Chantal were moving in he knew they wouldn't cause trouble and a well placed call to the realtor made the sale go through at record speed. While Chibs did all the work behind the scenes Milla worked hard getting her family ready for the move. Kenny didn't want to leave his basement bedroom and Ellie would miss having her own bathroom but Milla did some shuffling in the new house and found an arrangement that worked. Ellie got the attic room that used to be Milla's and Kenny got Jax's old room which Chibs kept as much like the original as possible. In the end everyone was happy with the changes made, but things didn't feel right, even a month after they moved in things weren't going as well as Milla'd hoped they would.

One night the reason for this disconcerting feeling came to Milla as she was playing a board game with Ellie and Kenny while Robby slept and Espy rolled a ball around the floor. There house was missing a vital component. There house was missing a Son. At the thought Milla stopped what she was doing and looked around. The house looked nice, most of the "Gemma" had been stripped away to leave room for the new family to grow within the walls. Everything was clean and neat but nothing was rough. There was no cigarette smoke, no biker magazines, no empty beer bottles on the counter in the kitchen. It didn't feel real and Milla knew what she had to do but didn't know if she'd be able to.

…

"Oy Chibs, it's yer Old Lady." Lucky, a brother who'd made the transfer from Belfast to Charming, pointed as Milla walked into the clubhouse for the first time since Jax and Bobbie's wake. She looked nervous and a little scared so Chibs got up and walked to her, not correcting Lucky since the best thing for Milla was for him to claim her. If she was his no one could touch her and without him she'd be fair game.

"Hi." Milla said softly as she tried to smile and failed miserably. Things were always awkward with Chibs ever since things went down. She still loved him like she always had but there were times when looking at him turned her stomach. Now she was hoping the love would win out when she asked him what she wanted to.

"Hi, want ta go talk in the office?" He asked and Milla nodded, relieved that she wouldn't have to get rejected publicly, if that's how things turned out. He guided her back to the office and had her sit down on the couch as he shut the door behind him and joined her. "Why're ya here Milla?"

"I have something to ask you, you're welcome to turn me down flat but I have to take my chances." She started before she took a deep breath and soldiered on. "I want you to move in with us. I know it seems like a strange request but the house feels wrong, there's something missing and I know it's you."

"Do ya mean that Milla? Ya want me ta move in with ya?" He asked and Milla nodded before she found herself placing her hands on his.

"Please, I know things have been awkward between us and I'm not always as kind and understanding to you as I should be. I'm sorry about that and I'll try to change, please don't hate me for it because I need you, the kids need you. You're the reason I'm alive right now." She told him as she squeezed his hands. He squeezed back and gave her a smile.

"When do ya want me ta move in?" He asked, his smile still wide and Milla smiled back as she hugged him then pulled away.

"Thank you so much. The kids will be so excited, they all love their Uncle Chibs. Really, I appreciate this. I know things are strained but I want to work on that. Everything you've done...I know you could have taken everything from me as compensation for what Juice did. Instead you gave me a place and protected me. I won't forget that." She told him before she pulled away completely but he took her hand.

"I never would'a taken yer life away Milla. No matter what they did. Ya mean too much ta me." He squeezed her hand before he resumed. "I'll always be here fer ya. Even if ya hate me I'll be here."

"I don't hate you Chibs, not even when you told me. I just...I just can't seem to wrap my head around the fact that you took him from me. I can't seem to reconcile the fact that what you did was the right thing with the fact that you killed him. I don't know if I ever will." She answered truthfully and Chibs hugged her.

"No matter how ya feel I won't abandon ya. I'm in it fer the long haul." He said and Milla nodded, knowing that he spoke the truth.

"Thank you." She teared up as she spoke. "How do you feel about the basement?"

"Works fer me darlin'" He said as he kissed the top of her head. Having a home with Milla and the kids sounded damn good to him.

…

Chibs sat at the kitchen table and enjoyed some tea from the pot Milla had brewed. It was one thing they had in common, they both liked their tea strong and black as coffee. As he enjoyed his tea he looked around the kitchen and grimaced, every inch of it still screamed "Gemma" even with the new paint job. That just wouldn't do, especially since it was Milla's favorite room in the house. He was torn from his thoughts by Ellie running into the kitchen and falling bonelessly into the chair across from him.

"Everythin' alright Elliedoll?" He asked her, using the nickname he'd picked up from Milla somewhere along the way.

"No, there's a mouse in my room. Will you take care of it?" She asked and he nodded.

"Aye, can't have vermin invadin our home." He smiled at her before he took out his cell phone and texted Phil, he needed prospects sent over ASAP.

"Uncle Chibs?" Ellie asked and Chibs looked up still smiling.

"Yeah darlin'?" He asked and Ellie looked uncomfortable for a second before she asked her question.

"Are you gonna stay? Aunt Milla says you live with us now but I don't know. I don't want you to go, everything feels right now. We feel like a real family." She explained and Chibs gave her a loving look.

"Yes Ellie, I'm gonna stay and we're gonna be a family. I won't abandon ya when ya need me." He explained and Ellie smiled.

"Thank you Uncle Chibs." She thanked him happily before she stood and walked over to him, giving him a hug. "I love you."

"I love ya too Elli. Go on an' watch some tv. I'll have the mouse problem taken care of as soon as Uncle Phil shows up." He told her and she smiled before she kissed his cheek in thanks and ran into the living room to watch some tv.

He sat back in his chair and smiled. It felt good to have a family again, kids that loved him and a place to find peace. This is what he'd dreamed of ever since he left Ireland all those years ago.

…

Later that night Milla walked into the house and sighed with relief. She'd spent the majority of the day helping Dondo with an emergency and was glad to be home to her babies and, if she was honest with herself, home to Chibs. There were still times when the sound of his voice grated on her nerves or his touch made her skin crawl but they were happening less frequently. She breathed in and let it out slowly at the thought. Maybe she could forgive Chibs, it would just take more time. She was deep in thought as she walked through the living room, then dining roo then entered the kitchen. So deep that she jumped when she heard a voice.

"Hey darlin', long day?" Chibs asked as he handed a plate with a small piece of pizza to Ellie who placed it on Espy's high chair before she got her own pizza and sat next to the little girl she called her little sister.

"Very long, you got dinner?" She asked and Chibs nodded before he plated up some pizza for Kenny who thanked him and sat at the place he'd designated as his own. Milla smiled and went up to him, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you. Did Chantal drop off Robby?"

"Naw, she and Phil are stopping by in a bit with movies and icecream. They 'ave a surprise they wanna share with the family." He told her and Milla smiled before she leaned up and kissed his scar.

"Thank you for everything." She smiled before she ushered him toward the table and made him a plate. As she set it in front of him she felt a sense of deja vu and it caused a gasp to leave her throat.

"Somethin' wrong Milla?" Chibs asked and Milla gave him a small smile before she placed a hand on his shoulder.

"No, maybe something is right." She squeezed his shoulder before she went and got her own plate then looked around as she sat with her family. "Yeah, something is right."

* * *

…

* * *

**Author's Note:** These segments keep coming to me and I've been editing some that I've already written so be expecting more. It's not going to be long but I feel like some of the story still needs to be fleshed out. I hope you're all enjoying this story and I'm not alienating any of you. I truly appreciate your readership.

To address the question left in the reviews, this is a separate AU from "The Truth Will Not Set You Free". In this Milla stays with Juice until he helps Clay in a revenge plot and is executed. In this AU Milla's building a life with Chibs as he holds her together after she loses almost everyone she knows. I hope this clears things up.


	4. Progress

**I own nothing you recognize. Only original characters and storylines are mine.**

**Progress**

"First order a' business. I just got a call from Oswald this mornin'. We're a go fer the orchard land and the land next ta it. We can start preparations for our foundation ASAP." Chibs announced once the meeting was in session. This brought whoops from the men surrounding the Redwood, good men, strong men, survivors. "Rat what news d'ya have on the units?"

"I got the estimates from Oswald and they'll lay the foundation and set up the units for a quarter off the price. For that discount all he wants is for us to advertise Oswald Construstion when we're done. He says we should be able to start in a month as long as the permits are a go." Rat detailed as he read the report in front of him and Chibs smiled. He'd had his reservations about making Ratboy Treasurer but it had turned out to be a perfect fit like Phil as Intelligence Officer. Lucky was still learning to be Secretary but with V-Lin working well as SaA he couldn't see any other fit. The table rounded out with Bully their transfer from Tacoma and some brothers from the disbanded Nomad charter. They'd needed all the bodies they could get at the table.

"Hap, what news did ya hear from Rogue River?" Chibs turned to his VP who sat back in his seat before he answered.

"Their rat problem has been fixed. They were exterminated this morning." Hap said matter of factly, he wished he'd been there, nothing like a good extermination to start the day.

"Good, Phil where are you on making sense of Juice's financial program?" Chibs asked and Phil started typing away at his laptop then smiled.

"I talked to Milla and she gave me a box of Juice's tech stuff. He had a modified hard drive in there with all of his codes and shit. It mated with the program on here and now we've got live feed of the financials if we want it." He said and Chibs grinned.

"That's some bloody good news." Chibs continued to smile and the rest of Church went well, things seemed to be lining up and even the Sheriff was leaving them alone. The man felt guilty about everything that happened and stayed away. He stayed even farther away after he ran into Milla on the street and she gave him a dressing down in front of his wife. They didn't need to grease his palms to get their way they just had to let a young, grief stricken, single mother give him a piece of her mind. As he thought about Milla his smile widened. For the last week things had been great. He'd been home almost every night and they had "family time" with the kids. They'd even made progress with each other. In fact, they'd spent a good portion of the night before snuggled together on the couch while they watched Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory with the kids. It felt nice to have her in his arms, it made him wonder how it would feel to have her underneath him.

"Alright, last order of business. I'd like to offer congratulations to Phil and his lovely new wife Chantal from the Club. We're happy for ya brutha." Chibs started clapping and the rest of the guys clapped and whooped while they patted Phil on the back.

"Thanks guys. I have something that I wanna ask the Club." Phil started and Chibs nodded.

"Go ahead brutha, you have the floor." He told him and Phil smiled.

"Chanty and I would like to have a reception here, invite Sons from other charters and just celebrate our marriage. The wedding was so spur of the moment and we missed having the family there. We just wanted to include everyone in this." He requested and Chibs nodded.

"Aye, we'd be honored to be part of yer celebration. Have Chantal talk ta the old ladies and make the plans. We'll set this up for two weeks from now, give us time to get some business done." He announce and Phil grinned.

"Thanks brother." Phil typed something into his computer and Chibs looked around.

"Anythin' else?" All heads shook in the negative. "Meetin' ajourned. Go on and get yer dicks wet."

Chibs banged the gavel and the guys filed out into the main room, some going for pussy and others going for booze. Chibs felt his grin stretch his face when he saw Milla sitting at a table with Chantal laughing about something. His eyes caught hers and she smiled at him, her eyes sparkling a bit so he walked up to her.

"Hey." Chibs took a seat and sat next to the women. "What're ya doin' here darlin'?" He asked and Milla took a sip of what looked like a Shirley Temple and turned her full attention to him.

"I have a favor to ask." Milla started and Chibs nodded his head for her to continue. "I want you to ask Hap to black out my crow. It's time to put that behind me."

Chibs raised his eyebrows as he looked at Milla, she was serious. He never thought she'd be willing to remove the mark, in fact he counted on it. When people saw the mark they knew she belonged to someone and he could pretend and keep her safe.

"Why d'ya wanna do that Milla? The Club's not gonna make ya." He asked and she took a deep breath.

"I'm not my old man's old lady anymore, he's dead. I don't want to look at my wrist every day and see his mark on me. I'm also going to ask Hap if he would be willing to black out the Ortiz on my neck and the date on my chest. I want it all gone. I'm stuck in the past when I look in the mirror and I need to think of my future." She told him and he looked down at his hands. She was right to an extent but a part of him knew she'd regret it and he wouldn't let her hurt like that.

"No, I'm not gonna ask him ta do that Milla." He said and she looked hurt. "As long as ya have that mark no one can touch ya and yer spoken fer. With that ya can move freely. Ya take that off and yer fair game." He said and frowned when he saw the stricken look on her face, then the idea came to him. "I can ask him ta change it though."

"What do you mean?" She asked, nervous about what implications there could be.

"He could change the bolts inta somethin else, maybe perch it on a branch or somethin." He suggested and Milla looked at her wrist before she looked at him, her eyes sad but resigned.

"Or he could put a Scottish flag in the talons, I am your old lady now, aren't I? You're responsible for me, aren't you?" She asked with a hitch in her voice as her eyes started to shine with tears. He looked at her for a minute before he noticed Chantal still in her seat, looking uncomfortable.

"Go see yer husband Chanty. I need ta talk ta Milla fer a minute." Chantal nodded and took off while Chibs moved closer to Milla. "What d'ya wat me ta say Milla? D'ya want me ta apologize. again? Ya want me ta say it shoulda been me?"

"No, it's just that I'm confused right now. I care about you and love the family we've created but I don-" She started before she stopped herself. "I need to talk to you alone."

"Come on then." He stood up and took Milla's hand when she stood with him. They bypassed the office and went back to the dorm rooms, stopping in the apartment that used to be Jax's. He opened the door and ushered her in before he locked the door behind them and turned on the light while Milla sat on the bed and he joined her. "What did ya want ta say Milla?"

"Ok, don't hate me for this." She took a deep breath before she continued. "I don't want you, in a...physical...way. I'm willing to accept the fact that I belong to you now. That, for all intents and purposes, you're my old man, but I'm still hurting, still wrapping my head around everything. I know it's been almost a year but...I still..."

She was at a loss for words and Chibs took her hands in his before he made her look into his eyes.

"Yer not ready yet. Yer still grieving. I understand that darlin'. I wouldn't do anythin' ya didn't want." He made sure his eyes didn't waver. "I'm not that sorta man."

"I'm so sorry Chibs. I know you have the right to every part of me, but I just can't." She had tears running down her cheeks and Chibs let go of her hand and ran his fingers through his hair.

"What're ya getting at Milla?" He was getting frustrated with the different ways she kept saying the same thing.

"I'm willing to wear your mark but I'm not ready to fuck you." She said it bluntly and Chibs' eyes widened, he'd asked and he definitely got his answer.

"Ya mean that, about my crow?" He couldn't deny that he'd been thinking about it over the last year as he got to know her better and he knew it was the right thing to do.

"I mean it, I'll wear your crow." She told him, her eyes filled with resolve and he nodded.

"Let's go talk ta Hap." He stood and helped Milla up before they walked out the door.

Chibs sighed as he watched Hap changing the mark on Milla's wrist. He covered the lightning bolts with a thatch of thistles. Something small, barely noticeable but the message was clear. She was officially his now. He hoped he could live up to her expectations.

…

"Neeta has Espy and Robby. I'm going to bring Ellie and Kenny with me. Are you going to meet me there?" She asked as she pulled on her coat and grabbed her keys. They were going to the cemetery to bring flowers and remember everyone that died on that horrible day a year ago and some that died before.

"Yeah, I'll meet ya there. SAMCRO's gonna ride out and fix up the graves." He said as he grabbed a sausage link from the plate on the table. "I'll meet ya at Jax's grave."

"Sounds like a plan." She moved up to him and kissed the scar on his cheek. "Ride safe."

"Aye, see ya soon." He told her and Milla nodded before she went out the door. Ellie and Kenny were waiting for her in the van.

…

Milla brushed away some of the dirt that had collected on the base of Jax's grave and let her tears fall. She missed her big brother. She missed his cocky grin, his swagger and his constant loyalty and love. She even missed his arrogance and his condescension, his spoiled petulance and anger issues. She missed the whole package and that made it so much harder to be here. She'd always lived in his shadow, ignored and brushed aside so everyone could concentrate on his issues. She'd resented him for it and resented her mother's obvious favoritism. There were times when she wished him off the face of the earth so she could get the attention she craved but now she could kick herself for even thinking those thoughts because it hurt too damn bad to have him gone. Now she'd give her left arm to have him back. She'd give anything to go back a year and stop it, to bring her life back to what it was. More tears came to her eyes as she thought about what took so many people she loved from her.

It had been one year ago and the Club was in upheaval. They'd just ended their relationship with the Galindo cartel and were beginning the move to legitimate business, a move which left many of the charters pissed off but Jax was stubborn and wanted a change. The charters would have eventually gotten behind Jax and moved the Club into the future if it hadn't been for Clay. He gave up any semblance of wanting to do right by the Club and made revenge his sole goal. He spent months planning a siege that would leave the Sons devastated. He'd take everything away from Jax, the way Jax took everything from him.

The day it happened started like any other day. They all got up, had breakfast with their families and went about their days. Except for Milla. She'd spent the night pacing the floor with a colicy baby while her husband was gone for the third day in a row. She knew Clay was behind it and cursed him. In the previous five months she'd gone from being a Daddy's girl to hating his guts. He'd all but destroyed her family and took her husband from her. She would never be able to forgive him for that. While she paced and cried with her baby, her world was starting to crash down.

She got the story from Phil after all was said and done. Clay's plan had been as brilliant as it had been ruthless. He'd had Lorca make calls to every Son they knew loyal to Jax and Juice had the duty of calling Jax, Gemma and Tara. He gave them all different messages but they all had the same endgame. They had to come to the warehouse on Oswald's land if they wanted the other to survive. They all arrived at the warehouse and looked around in confusion as they saw the Sons gathered, equally confused. They went into the warehouse to figure out what the hell was going on and that's when the plan went into action. Clay had all of the doors sealed and his men stationed at the windows and in the rafters with guns at the ready. They opened fire and Jax started barking orders, trying to get everyone out and having anyone with weapons return fire. They managed to take a few of them out and Phil managed to find a weak spot in the wall that he and Chibs attacked. They had almost made it through when there was smoke starting to fill the room. They'd set the building on fire after soaking the boards in gasoline and other accelerants the building went up fast. After they'd almost given up hope of escape Happy left his position next to Jax and chopped through with an axe he'd found. Once they had a chance for escape Chibs pushed Tara out of the opening and went back only to watch a beam fall on Jax and pin him to the floor. He and Happy ran to Jax but it was too late, the beam had broken his neck so they turned their attention to Gemma who had collapsed. Bobby grabbed her and tried to carry her to freedom but he collapsed and in his last breath told them to get out of there. They had no choice but to listen and proceeded to leave before the fire spread further. Unable to rescue their fallen brothers they climbed out and were expecting to be shot. Instead they watched bikes and the T-M truck pulling out. It didn't surprise them, They wouldn't have expected anyone to survive either. Chibs found Tara sitting with Phil by her car while he held her sobbing form. Bully and Koz were seated farther off coughing until bile crawled up their throats and Hap was standing close to the warehouse, watching it burn. Chibs joined him and allowed tears to roll down his cheeks. His President and best friend was dead as well as many brothers and a woman he loved like family...Clay and his little puppets would pay.

It was less than a week later when the deed was done and everyone responsible had paid the price. Less than a week later Milla's world came crashing down.

…

Chibs watched Milla cry from her position in front of Jax's grave. She was kneeling with tears falling down her face and hitting the stone. He wanted to give her some time but he needed to visit his brother's grave. He made sure to make noise as he walked up to her and Milla rose and looked at him, quickly grabbing a tissue and wiping her eyes before she blew her nose.

"I cleaned off his tombstone. The prospects won't have to do much here." She said as she moved closer to Chibs who held her in his arms. "Thank you."

She breathed out as she held him back, needing the comfort his arms provided. She'd already visited her mom's, Bobby's and Opie and Donna's shared plot. Jax was her last visit for the day and she was emotionally exhausted. Chibs held her for a minute longer before he moved his head and saw her looking up at him. Her eyes filled with need and he dipped his head down, prepared to offer her comfort in this way when footsteps came up behind them.

"Yo Chibs, Alvarez is here to pay his respects." V-Lin spoke and Milla jerked away from Chibs, obviously embarrassed. Chibs wanted to beat V-Lin to the ground for stopping the inevitable but he just turned and glared at his SaA before he saw Milla hugging herself and looking at her shoes.

"I'm...I'm gonna get the kids and head out to pick up the lunch. Then we'll meet you at the clubhouse." Mila said before she looked at Chibs who nodded.

"Aye, I'll see ya at the clubhouse." He told her and she turned and went back to Donna and Ope's graves, she had to get the kids and she had a lot of thinking to do.

…

Later that night Chibs got shitfaced. They'd all started taking shots in memory of their brothers that had died and wound up going overboard. It was safe to say that Chibs was not in his right mind, drunk and wallowing in despair. He was also horny as hell. Having Milla in his arms had caused his blood to heat up and he needed release. That release was going to be the brunette sweetbutt in the corner. She was tiny with dark hair and dark eyes, enough of an avatar for him to pretend he was getting what he really wanted. By the time they went toward the dorms all had been claimed. There wasn't anywhere to go. Normally he'd just fuck her in the main room but even in his drunken state he knew he ran the risk of vocalising his fantasies and he didn't want it getting back to Milla so his only recourse was to take her to his basement room. If he'd been sober he would've realized what a mistake that was.

…

Milla was woken up at a quarter to three in the morning by the sound of glass breaking and loud voices downstairs. She quickly got out of bed and grabbed the beretta she kept in her nightstand for situations like this. After she left her room she checked the nursery, then Kenny's room. Ellie was safe in the attic so Mill slowly made her way downstairs and once she was on the final step she unlocked the safety and held it at her side. She could hear laughing and a masculine grunt. Taking a deep breath she pushed off the last step and turned the corner, pointing her gun ahead of her. What she saw caused her heart to sink in her chest.

There was Chibs, facedown in a brunette's lap while she giggled. Milla stood stricken for a few moments, shock taking over her body before something in her snapped and she felt rage enter her. Chibs had brought a whore into their house with the kids upstairs. Fuck him if he thought she'd be ok with that.

"What the fuck's going on here?" Milla asked, her gun now turned down pointing at the floor. Chibs sat up and looked guiltily at her. The drunken fog that had clouded his mind receding as he saw the rage on her face, but what sobered him more was the hurt in her eyes.

"Milla, I thought ya were asleep." He said lamely as he moved away from the croweater who pouted and sat up with him. She looked annoyed until she saw who had interrupted them, then her annoyance was replaced with fear. All the sweetbutts knew better than to fuck with Milla. It was a good way to get kicked out of Charming and even out of clubhouses the world over.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't know." The sweetbutt said and Milla just gave her a look.

"Get out of my house and if anyone tries to bring you back here I recommend you turn them down. I'm never this nice twice." The croweater nodded and hastily got off the couch and ran out the door while Chibs remained in his position on the couch.

"We didn' mean ta wake ya up." Chibs said calmly as he held up his hands in a motion of peace and Milla flicked the safety back on the gun and set it on the coffee table before she spoke, her soft voice radiating rage.

"You brought a whore into our home, where my kids are? What the fuck is going on in your head?" She asked, never taking her eyes off of Chibs.

"I was thinkin' about gettin' laid." He growled defensively and Milla snorted.

"And you thought bringing her here would be a good idea." She snorted again and his hackles rose.

"This is my fuckin' house! I should get ta bring back any gash I want!" He shouted and Milla curled her lip.

"Your house? Is your name on the fucking deed? This is my home, my children's home and you're here because I thought I needed you. If I would've known you'd show me so much disrespect and put my kids at risk like this I never would've invited you to live here. I don't owe you enough to put up with this shit." She glared and Chibs glared back at her.

"Yer my old lady, did ya forget that? Maybe if ya were a good old lady I wouldn't a had to go fer a gash like that. Maybe if ya'd fuck me I wouldn't have ta fuck some whore." He growled before he continued. "Maybe that's it, maybe yer jealous, ya want me ta fuck ya. That's why yer riled ya don't want me fuckin a croweater because I'm not fuckin ya.

"I don't give a fuck if you fuck every croweater and whore from here to Belfast, as long as you don't bring them into our fucking home where my kids are. Maybe I'm not a good old lady, maybe that's why you think you can treat me with this much disrespect. Bringing her here was a slap in the fucking face. It would've hurt way less if you actually did slap me. Now I know that I'm just an obligation to you, you don't really care about me like you said you did." She sighed before she picked up her gun and gave him a sad look. "I'm glad you didn't kiss me in the cemetery. Now I have nothing to regret."

She turned and went back upstairs, shutting the light off as she went up the stairs, leaving Chibs in darkness. He ran his hands through his hair before he got up and went down the hall to the basement door.

"Fuck!" He exclaimed before he punched the wall. He'd fucked up, lord knew if he'd ever be close to Milla again. His disrespect spoke volumes to her. Too bad the volumes were full of lies. He did care about her. Far more than he was willing to admit.

Over the next week Milla made a concerted effort to stay as far away from Chibs as possible and only talked to him when she had to. He'd hurt her and she still had too much Gemma in her to ignore it. Chibs did his best to show remorse for his actions, he brought home dinner every night and helped with the kids. He'd changed more nappies in one week than he'd changed in seventeen years. It didn't help though, Milla was still hurt and threw herself into Phil and Chantal's reception/dance. It was a good excuse to keep her busy and out of the house. It was also a good way to keep her away from Chibs.

All of her sidestepping and avoidance was for naught when the party rolled around. It seemed that Chibs and Milla were constantly put together for pictures and were seated together at a table with the kids. Neither knew it but it was Chantal's idea. She was sick of seeing her best friend miserable and she'd seen the spark between Milla and Chibs. She knew there was only one way to heal Milla's heart and it was for her to let him in. Chantal nervously watched them all evening, waiting for the blowup she hoped wouldn't happen. She needn't have watched so closely. Plans sometimes have a strange way of working out.

Milla was sitting at the table with Kenny sitting on her lap. Espy and Robby had gone home with Neeta an hour before and the older kids were allowed to stay for a few dances and Kenny was already tuckered out so Milla held him in her lap, happy he took more after his pixielike mother than his sasquatch father.

"Couples Dance time. Come on up and join Phil and Chantal in their dance. All lovers welcome!" The DJ shouted and Milla felt a pain in her heart. She used to love the couples dances. Juice wasn't much of a dancer but he was always great at slow dancing. He knew how to hold her. What bothered her more though was the fact that she'd thought she'd found another man to share this with but was mistaken. She'd never felt more alone. As she pitied herself a shadow fell over her and she looked up to see Chibs standing there, a look of determination on his face.

"Dance with me lovely. Give me a chance." He said and Milla felt something in her chest loosen at the look in his eyes. It was an emotion she wasn't ready to process but it was enough. She gently got Kenny off her lap before she took Chibs' hand and let him lead her to the floor. Once there he folded her in his arms like he had before the shit went down with the croweater and she found herself resting her head on his shoulder. She felt safe, she felt...loved.

When the realization hit she looked up abruptly and saw the love in Chibs' eyes and knew it was real. She also knew that she felt something achingly similar and allowed herself the luxury of feeling it. Chibs took that as his cue and, not wanting Milla to bolt, he brought his lips to hers and felt her surrender to him. They stayed on the dance floor completely absorbed in each other, both knowing things would never be the same.


	5. Moving Forward

**I own nothing you recognize. All original characters and storylines are my own. With the exception of Gilly who belongs to the wonderful Superdani.**

**Moving Forward**

"Can you hand me that bread?" Milla asked Chibs as she sliced some cheese for Ellie's sandwich.

"What's it worth ta ya?" Chibs asked with a mischievous grin and Milla smirked back before she turned and threw her arms around his neck.

"Maybe this would persuade you to hand over the bread." She pulled him down and placed her lips against his as he pulled her closer before he broke the kiss and pressed his forehead against hers.

"Aye, that'll persuade me." He kissed her one last time before he let her go and handed the bread over.

"Thanks, when are you heading out?" She asked as she quickly put together a ham and turkey sandwich with colby for Ellie, then made Kenny a ham and swiss.

"Around ten, we're meetin' Alvarez at noon, wanna get the layout first." He told her as he put two pieces of bread in the toaster and Milla put an orange in Kenny's bag.

"Just be careful, I know the Sons have had a strong alliance with the Mayans for a few years now, but I'm worried how things are going down...the shootout in Oakland..." She said as she bit her lip and looked at him with worry in her eyes.

"Don't worry _mo ghraidh_, we're jus' providin muscle fer a meet. We'll be safe." He said as he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close. "Don' ya trust me?"

"Of course, I just worry." She gave him a sheepish smile and looked so cute that he couldn't resist bringing his mouth to hers again. They soon got lost in each other until they heard a voice from the doorway.

"Gross." They broke apart and Chibs pressed his forehead to Milla's before they turned to greet Kenny who went to his seat and sat down. "What's for breakfast?"

"There's some cereal on the counter, just pick which kind you want and I'll get you some milk." Milla told him as she went to the fridge while Kenny got some cereal and a bowl for him and one for Ellie.

"Thanks Mom." He said when Milla handed him the milk and Milla froze solid while Chibs' eyes widened.

"What was that sweetheart?" She asked and Kenny gave her a smile as he poured his cereal.

"You're my mom and I love you. It feels weird to call you Auntie Milla when you're more than that." After that he started eating his cereal and Milla leaned against the counter. She was his Mom now, it felt wonderful.

She continued to smile as tears rolled down her cheeks and Chibs walked up to her and put an arm around her shoulder as he kissed her head. She turned her face up to him and he kissed her again, both enjoying this new change. Soon Ellie came into the kitchen with Robby balanced on her hip and Espy holding her hand. When she saw Milla's face she looked at Chibs then her brother with a scathing look.

"What did you do to Mommy now?" She asked and Milla's light tears turned to a sob, she was so happy she could barely breathe and Chibs grinned, but stood shocked with what Ellie said next. "Dad, why's Mom crying?"

He left Milla's side and engulfed Ellie in his arms. He'd dreamed of being a Da again and now he was. His family was real and it was here. Milla stopped her sobs and went to Kenny who looked confused. She hugged her son tight and kissed his head before she ushered everyone back to the table. The kids still had to eat breakfast before they went to school and Neeta and Chibs needed to get ready to go. Later that night she'd order pizza and get a movie. Her family deserved some bonding time.

…

"Happy birthday." Milla whispered softly as she wrapped her arms around Chibs' shoulders and kissed his cheek. "Sleep well?"

"Woulda slept better if we coulda finished what we started on the couch last night." He gave her a wicked grin and she ducked her head.

"We talked about this Chibs." She said quietly as she stood up but when she tried to walk away he grabbed her wrist and pulled her onto his lap.

"Aye we did an' I think we need ta talk some more." He said as he made her look him in the eye. "It's been almost two years _mo graidh_, he's dead an' yer obligation ta stay faithful ta him died with him. I know yer tryin' but I've got needs...ya've got needs."

He ran his hand up the slit in her robe and she had swallowed thickly. He was right, she did have needs and right now those needs were playing havoc with her lower body. He kept moving his hand and she ducked her head to kiss him. She felt strange, almost like a whore, but the needs and desires were starting to push those thoughts away. She started to rise, not breaking contact with his mouth, preparing to straddle him when the sounds of small feet rushing down the steps pulled her away.

"We're not done here lovely." He said and Milla gave him an apologetic look but didn't have time to respond before Espy rounded the corner into the kitchen with Ellie behind and ran to Chibs.

"Daddy!" Esperanza squealed as she ran into Chibs' waiting arms. As she threw her little arms around his neck she smacked a big kiss on his cheek. "'appy birfday!"

"It is now darlin'." He smiled as he opened his arms for Ellie who hugged him.

"Happy birthday Dad." She said before she kissed his cheek and he continued to grin.

"It looks like it's goin ta be one." He said happily as he settled in for breakfast with his family. It was shaping up to be a happy birthday indeed.

…

"Ok, you three hang up the banner and streamers. You go in the kitchen and check on the chili, it needs to be good enough for everyone here. Jock, clean off the picnic tables." Milla walked around the room issuing orders for the various sweetbutts and prospects littered around the main room. She wanted Chibs' party to be perfect and that meant tapping into the Gemma reserve.

"Louis, go see if the guys need anything outside, I have to go to the back for a few minutes." She told the prospect standing closest to her who nodded and she made her way to the back.

She went into the apartment and looked at the outfit she had set out and suppressed a nervous shiver. She had a simple heather grey shirt dress that went well with the soft suede ankle boots she planned on wearing. That wasn't the part of the outfit that made her nervous. No, her nerves came from the simple white silk and lace negligee she had to go under it. It was too low cut and high-hemmed to be practical, it's purpose was seduction and she'd made up her mind, she was going to let her final walls down. She was going to let Chibs finally have every part of her. She was his big present at the end of the night. Part of her was excited, but a larger part was nervous and sick at the thought of letting anyone other than Juice share that intimacy with her. She'd promised him fidelity all those years ago and it was nearly ingrained in her DNA. It made it practically impossible for her to even consider having sex with anyone else, even someone she loved as dearly as Chibs.

The nerves and anxiety were the reason she'd planned this evening. She knew that if she were to wait until she was ready she'd be waiting forever and she couldn't do that to Chibs or herself. She just had to bite the bullet and go for it. After she gave herself a pep talk she stripped out of her clothes and put on the outfit, being sure to put the negligee on with care. She needed to look good for her man.

Chibs stood in front of the "wall of fame" looking at the pictures of his brothers. The wall looked much different now than it had before. Now the dead took prominence at the top of the wall and there were several faces missing, their pictures burnt with everything else that had tied them to the Club. He found himself looking at the picture of Tig and allowed himself a sad smile. Tig would've hated this party. It was all about the families, not cheap booze and cheaper pussy like he liked. He toasted his fallen brother who had been given the chance to give his life for his final daughter and took it. His sacrifice becoming a tale of legend among the Sons. Chibs missed the crazy, noble, wild son of a bitch.

"It's your birthday...You shouldn't be sad." Milla told him as she walked up to him and he held out his arm so he could pull her close to him.

"I'm not sad _mo graidh_, I was just thinkin' about how much Tigger woulda hated this party." He chuckled and Milla chuckled with him.

"I miss him." She said softly and Chibs squeezed her tight.

"Me too darlin', me too." He continued to hug her for a few minutes before he looked down at her, "Hear from Koz and Gilly?"

"Yeah, they wish they could be here but with her ready to pop any minute it's not a good idea to travel that far. They send their love and the present's in the mail." She told him and he found himself chuckling.

"It better be in the mail an' it better be fuckin brilliant! Considerin' the gift we just gave 'em." Chibs declared and Milla smiled. The gift they gave had been the deed to a new house with room for the baby, it was only reasonable to expect a brilliant gift.

"I have a gift for you later babe. I hope you think it's brilliant." She made her voice husky at the end and Chibs raised his eyebrow as she walked away, swinging her hips in a movement that was all for him. His mind started to wander into dangerous territory so he turned away. She couldn't have meant what he thought she meant.

…

"Why don't we head to the apartment for a little while?" Milla suggested a few hours later. Chelsea and Chantal had arranged a soccer game with the older kids and the little ones were being entertained with toys and a movie in the clubhouse. That meant that the adults were free to enjoy themselves if they wanted to and after spending all day in close proximity to Chibs, Milla definitely wanted to.

"What d'ya mean lovely?" Chibs asked and Milla reached up to run her hand down his chest.

"You know what I mean." She gave him a wicked smile and Chibs grabbed Milla's hand and walked with her into the clubhouse and moved quickly through the main room and down the hallway. In record time they made it to the apartment and Chibs had barely closed the door before he had her pinned to it, his tongue down her throat and his hands unbuttoning her dress. Once he got the buttons undone he moved away to strip it off her and stopped when he saw what she was wearing.

"Yer goin' ta be the death of me." He breathed out before he ran his hands over the lace and silk, practically salivating as he felt the body underneath..

"I love you." She whispered softly and that was it, he was on her again. He'd finally pushed the dress off her shoulders and was going to the hem of her negligee when there was a loud pounding on the door and Chibs broke away.

"Occupied! Get the fuck out of here!" He shouted and Milla giggled as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for another kiss but they were torn apart by more pounding.

"Chibs, we've got an emergency man." Phil's voice came clearly through the door and he reluctantly moved away from Milla who quickly picked up her dress and buttoned it back up once she'd slipped it on before she tied her belt.

"Go on, we can pick this up later." She smiled at him and he pulled her to him and crushed his mouth to hers.

"You stay here, I'll be right back." He kissed her again before he walked out and talked quickly with Phil. She heard him swear and he came back only a few moments later and spoke to her quietly and urgently. "We've got ta head out, I don' know all the details but we have ta go. Just keep the party goin and we'll return as soon as we can."

"I understand." She leaned up on tiptoe and kissed his lips gently. "Be safe."

"Love you." He whispered before he kissed her one last time and went out the door. Once she was alone Milla leaned back on the door again and took a deep breath. Maybe she and Chibs weren't supposed to be intimate, maybe this was a sign.

…

"Ellie can you watch Espy and Robby for a few minutes? I have to put the food away and take care of some stuff for your Dad." Milla asked and Ellie just nodded before she took Espy and Robby over to what was affectionately known as doll corner. Once they were busy Milla walked into the kitchen and started unpacking the box Louis had brought over with leftovers from the party and the cake Chibs didn't get to eat. As Milla put the chili away the phone rang and she immediately answered.

"Telford-Ortiz Residence, Milla speaking." She answered, using the hyphenation she and Chibs had started to use routinely. It made sense since it was their combined household.

"Is Filip Telford there?" A young, timid sounding girl with an Irish accent asked and Milla's brow furrowed for a second.

"I'm sorry, Filip was called away on an emergency. I can take a message if you want." Milla offered as she put the last of the food that needed immediate refrigeration away.

"When d'ya think he'll be back? I really wanna talk ta him, wish him a happy birthday." The voice said and realization hit Milla.

"Kerrianne?" She asked and there was a long silence on the line.

"Aye, I'm Kerrianne. He's told ya about me?" She asked and Milla smiled softly.

"He talks about you all the time sweetheart. You're his girl, he's very proud of you." Milla answered honestly and she heard Kerrianne breathe in then let it out slowly.

"Yer his woman, aren't ya. Da said ya were young." She said and Milla wasn't sure if she was being snarky or not.

"Yes, I'm his old lady and yes there is an age difference between your father and I. What has he told you about me?" She asked as she sat at the kitchen table and Kerrianne took a few moments to answer.

"He's told me that he loves ya, ya have a family together. He says he's happy. Tha's all that matters." Kerrianne said quietly before she continues. "Does he make ya happy?"

"So, so happy, Kerrianne." After that there was an awkward silence for a few moments, both wanting to say so much but being unable to until Milla spoke up. "Where's the Doctor when you need him?"

"You watch Dr. Who?" Kerrianne asked, suddenly interested.

"I have every existing episode on DVD." Milla told her and suddenly Kerrianne was animated, talking about her love for the doctor and telling Milla more about herself. They were on the phone for at least an hour while they filled each other in on their lives and Milla even had the kids talk to her. She could tell that Kerrianne was in love with her little brothers and sisters and wanted to meet them but couldn't ask the question so Milla did it for her.

"We'd love to have you come for a visit Kerri. If you wanna come you have a home here, you'll always have a home here." She said and smiled as she heard sniffling on Kerri's end.

"Thank ya, I can't thank ya enough fer the invitation." She said happily and Milla smiled loudly.

"No need to thank me, we're family now and we can't wait to meet you here." After that they said their goodbyes and hung up, promising to talk more often and Milla sniffed as she felt tears enter her eyes. Her family just got larger and she couldn't have been happier.

…

It was the middle of the night when Milla was woken up by scuffling and banging downstairs. Preparing for the worst she took her gun from her nightstand and made her way downstairs. What she was greeted with when she got downstairs caused her heart to stop in her chest.

"How bad is he?" She asked Phil as he wrestled Chibs onto the couch and Milla knelt by him.

"He's pretty bad." Phil told her as he rubbed his hand on the back of his neck and Lucky came from their pantry with the huge professional grade first aid kit they had.

"I need to get to him Milla." V-Lin told her and Milla stood and watched as both men started to remove Chibs' clothes as gently as they could.

"Do you want me to go downstairs and get him some clothes?" She asked and V-Lin just nodded as she rushed down to the basement and quickly grabbed a clean pair of boxers from his dresser and a wifebeater. When she got upstairs she handed the clothes to Phil before she went to the linen cabinet and grabbed the warmest, softest blanket she could find and brought it to them. V-Lin nodded toward the chair and she set it down as she stood still and they all watched Lucky start to clean the blood off of Chibs' face and the lacerations on his arms. When she saw the bruising on his chest and side she felt a frightening sense of deja vu and had to sit on the arm of the chair.

"Milla, love, could ya bring me a couple bottles a' water. I need clean water ta wash these wounds." Milla didn't say anything she just went into the kitchen and took some water from the cabinet under the serving window and thought enough to bring a lighter in case they needed it.

"Thank ya." Lucky gave her a quick smile before he started fixing Chibs up in earnest. When he started to stitch Chibs up Milla felt her stomach turn but she couldn't look away. She didn't want Chibs to open his eyes and see her turned away. She needed to show that she was a good, strong old lady and could handle anything. She'd handled this shit before and she'd continue to handle it.

Soon Lucky had all of Chibs' wounds cleaned and wrapped and with Phil and V-Lin's help he got Chibs' ribs taped. While they debated what to do with their fallen President he opened his eyes as far as he could and they landed on Milla.

"M-" He started but Milla shook her head before she placed a gentle kiss on his bruised and battered lips, silencing him. She ran her fingers through his hair while she smiled down at him before she turned to the three men.

"Can you bring him upstairs?" She asked and the men nodded. "Good, bring him to my bedroom, there's a private bathroom and I'll be there to take care of him."

She smiled down at her man before she moved away and allowed the other men to carry him up the stairs. Once he was situated they left with the promises that they'd be back the next day and Milla nodded and ushered them out. Once the security system was armed, the doors locked and the lights shut off Milla went upstairs to see Chibs asleep so she crawled into bed next to him and curled up, being sure not to touch his wounds. Now that she knew he was home safe she could finally sleep and relax.

He stayed in bed for another week, it turned out that his injuries were worse than he let on but that didn't matter to Milla. She was there to take care of him and that's just what she did. He continued to share a bed with Milla and they discovered that they liked the closeness but Chibs' injuries and Milla's hangups kept them from consummating their relationship. Eventually they settled into sharing a room and desperately wanted to be with each other but their timing always seemed to be off. It was like the gods were conspiring to keep them sexless.

…

"Why the bloody hell is the dishwasher broken?" Chibs asked angrily and Milla smiled as she handed him the silverware which he set in the sink to soak for a few minutes before they started washing.

"Kenny heard that you could clean your cleats in the dishwasher and he'd stained his during soccer practice so...here we are without a dishwasher." She moved close to Chibs and added some bleach to the water, a couple of the spoons were tarnished and they needed to be clean. "You can go to the den if you want. I'll finish up in here."

"No, I'm helpin' ya with this. I haven't been alone with ya in a while." The subtext was heavy in his voice and Milla felt herself heat up. God, she wanted everything his tone of voice had to offer.

"Ok, I just need to get Espy's bowl, then we can finish this up." She smiled at him before she turned and picked up the bowl.

On her way to the sink she suddenly found her feet losing their grip on the tiles in the kitchen and before she knew it she'd slipped and Chibs caught her, holding her tightly to his body. They stayed there for what seemed like an eternity before he brought his mouth to hers in a passionate kiss. They'd kissed each other hundreds of times over the last year, maybe thousands, but nothing could compare to the way his mouth explored hers. The kiss was fueled by need, by love, by desire and when Chibs pulled away and looked into her eyes he saw everything he'd dreamed of seeing. She was looking at him, her dark eyes wide and filled with the same love, desire and need he felt in their kiss. He silently asked if she wanted him and she nodded slowly, too overwhelmed to speak. He pulled her even tighter against him and kissed her until small, helpless noises came from her throat and that was it for him. He pressed her back against the counter and viciously swiped his arm out to knock away anything that could get in their way. With Milla's help he got her onto the counter and only broke from her long enough to get her shirt over her head and her shorts and panties off her hips. Once she was naked all rational thought fled them both and they gave into their baser instincts.

…

"Ya know what this means, don' ya _mo graidh_?" Chibs asked as he held Milla in his arms while they lay in their bed, which they christened after their christening of the kitchen.

"What does this mean... Filip?" She asked, feeling like their newfound intimacy demanded a new moniker for her man. He made a face before he responded.

"It means ya belong ta me, all a' ya, heart an' soul." He leaned his face down and they kissed again as he turned her onto her back. He might not've had it in him for another go but he could still make her feel good but before he did what he planned he pulled away and looked Milla in the eyes. "I belong ta you too."

"I love you Filip." Milla whispered and Chibs gave her that look again before he kissed her deeply. As he ran his hand down her stomach to between her legs he stared intensely into her eyes.

"I love ya too darlin' but don' call me Filip." He commanded and Milla smiled before she reached a hand up and gently ran a finger over his scar.

"Whatever you say...my Chibs." He smiled down at her before he brought his mouth to her collarbone to start his trip south. As he moved lower Milla moaned as he hit the sensitive areas of her skin. Soon she was writhing under his ministrations and when she could take no more she screamed the name of the man she loved, her man, head of her family, "Chibs!"

* * *

…

* * *

**A/N:** _Mo graidh_ means "my love" in Scots-Gaelic, it seemed like the right term for him to use.


	6. Gifts

**I own nothing you recognize. All original characters and storylines are my own.**

**Gifts**

"How many times do I have ta tell ya? It meant nothin' I jus' got a blowjob." Chibs ground out through gritted teeth while Milla looked at him with eyes that held a mixture of sadness and rage.

"I've told you, I'm not equipped to deal with infidelity. It's the one thing I never had to deal with with Juice and I thought you'd respect me enough to stay faithful. How can you claim to love me if you can't keep your dick in your pants?" Milla asked and Chibs let out a bark of derisive laughter.

"Ya think that rat was faithful?" Chibs asked as he gave her a hard look. "He fucked his fair share a' whores at the end. Drowning his guilt in pussy. Remember all a' those times I told ya he was doin shit fer the Club? Most a those times he was balls deep in some Club gash. I didn't want ya hurtin so I covered fer him. How d'ya feel about yer perfect Juicy now?"

At Chibs' accusation Milla felt the strength in her legs vanish and she fell heavily against the arm of the chair she was standing by. As she sagged she looked at him, her pain taking over.

"You bastard, how could you...how could you take that from me? One of the last good things about him and you took it from me." Tears started pouring down Milla's face and she stood from her seat and left the room. She couldn't stand to be near him at that moment.

Chibs ran a hand over his face and cursed. He thought Milla understood the rules, what happens on a run stays on a run and he was on a god damned run. He didn't know he'd have to deal with a hickey near his balls. A hickey that Milla had found when she decided to give him a blowjob before the kids came back from school. He knew it had to hurt her but the principle stood, he was a Son and he was allowed to seek comfort on the road. Milla was raised in the life, she knew the rules and had no right to get on him about it. He seethed for a second before a flash of guilt hit him. Yes, she had no right to bitch him out but he had no right to divulge the secret of Juice's last betrayal. She was right, his fidelity was the last good thing, other than her children, that Milla could look back on and he'd torn that from her. Shit, he'd definitely fucked up.

…

"No, don't do this to me. Not now." Milla pleaded to the small bit of plastic that she had sitting on the counter in front of her. The three minutes of waiting had already fried her nerves, now the blue plus sign sealed it. The blue plus sign went well with the two pink stripes of the test she took before that and the purple circle on the test before that. She was pregnant, a trip to the doctor would just be a waste of her insurance at this point. Sighing, she threw the test in the trash and washed her hands before she walked down to the kitchen and started to clean. She had a lot to think about and cleaning helped her mind work.

As she cleaned she tried to figure out what to do. There couldn't have been a worse time to find out she was pregnant. She and Chibs were fighting, their house had become a cold war zone. They hardly ever went to bed without sniping at each other and the only type of sex they were having was angry sex. It was starting to affect the kids but no matter how much she tried to hide everything from the kids they were all too observant to ignore the signs. Robby had started acting up at daycare and Espy was fighting with the kids in school. Milla had tried to forgive Chibs and put it all behind her but every time she saw him naked she remembered that another woman had been there and it pissed her off, but more importantly she was hurt by what he said and she was too much like her mother to just ignore it and move on.

Eventually the kitchen was clean and Milla still had no idea how she was going to handle her situation. She and Chibs were not in the right place for a baby, not emotionally and not with their lives as busy as they were. She sighed again and went into the living room to mindlessly watch some tv for a while, she knew what she had to do and she wasn't looking forward to it.

…

"What's the matter with ya? Yeh've barely said two words to me tonight." Chibs asked as he put a wifebeater on and moved toward the bed. Milla simply watched him trying to figure out just how she felt and how to tell him. Taking a deep breath she decided that it was better to just rip off that particular bandaid.

"I'm pregnant." Milla told him as he sat on the end of the bed and hejust stared at her.

"Are ya sure?" He asked her as he moved closer to her on the bed and she nodded.

"I've been sick for the last week or so and I'm late so I decided to buy some tests to be sure. I took three this morning and they all came back positive. There's no question, I'm having your baby." She told him and he got up from his spot and walked to her. Once he was close enough he sat next to her on the bed.

"What d'ya wanna do _mo graidh_?" He asked and Milla shivered as he called her the Gaelic nickname he hadn't since they'd begun fighting.

"I know this isn't the right time for us, we still have so many issues but I love you. It will probably take me some time to adjust to the fact that you take advantage of the rules, but I will adjust. I love you too much to let my hurt break apart all that we've fought for. I want this baby and I want you." Milla explained as she reached a hand up and ran her fingertips along his jaw while he smiled broadly.

"I love ya too _mo graidh_." He said softly before he brought his lips to hers and was relieved when she kissed him back. Once the kiss broke he pressed his forehead against hers. "Marry me."

At his proposal she moved away and looked at him with wide eyes before she frantically shook her head.

"No, I can't marry you. I love you but I can't." She looked at him pleadingly and his brow furrowed in confusion.

"Why not? I love ya, I love our family and I want ya ta have my name. So marry me." He proposed again and Milla reached out a hand to touch his face again as she shook her head.

"Even if I felt like I was emotionally ready for this step and if we were ready I can't marry you. You still have a wife in Ireland."She explained Chibs cursed He'd been so happy about the baby that he'd forgotten all about Fiona.

"I'll talk ta her, explain this, explain us. She can't deny me this happiness." He explained and Milla moved forward and kissed him gently again.

"Just make love to me Chibs, we can talk again in the morning." She told him and he smiled as he pulled her into his arms and crushed his mouth to hers. He was going to make love to her alright, there was no other emotion he was feeling at the moment.

…

_Two months later..._

Chibs breathed in the scent of the Irish air as he stepped out of the airport. He and Lucky were in Belfast to check on things with SAMBEL and Chibs was happy to be back. Other than the work for the Club he planned on spending some time with Kerrianne and meeting her fiance. He couldn't believe his little girl was getting married but as long as the fella treated her right he would never wish to deny her happiness. Along with seeing Kerri Chibs knew he needed to see Fiona, to request a divorce and tell her about his new life, with the woman he loved. He wanted to be free to marry Milla when the time was right. So far Milla had turned down every proposal, always gently and with assurances that she loved him, but turned him down nonetheless. He'd learned to take it in stride, having seen how Juice had handled her rejection all those times she refused him. Milla wasn't the type to go into marriage lightly and Chibs refused to back down. He was determined that the next time he proposed to Milla he'd be on his way to being a free man and she'd have no excuse.

…

"Thanks fer meetin with me Fi." Chibs thanked his, still technically on paper, wife and Fiona nodded as she placed a cup in front of him and poured the tea she'd brewed.

"Well yeh are my husband Filip. Though I hear yeh've forgotten that fact." She said coldly and Chibs knew that she knew all about Milla.

"Kerri tell ya?" He asked and Fiona joined him on the couch and looked at him with solemn eyes.

"Aye, she told me, an' Trinny heard from that boy 'a hers an' shared the news with me." She took a breath then continued. "Why Filip? I know yeh still love me, love our family."

"Aye Fi, I love ya, I'll always love ya an' Kerri but I love Milla an' love my new family. I know I shoulda come here with Lucky sooner but SAMCRO was in shambles an' I needed ta stay put ta put it back together. I couldn't come ta ya." He explained and Fiona pursed her lips.

"I see, yeh got a new, young bird an' she turned yer head." She said and Chibs took a deep breath.

"It's not like that Fiona. It all started when I was given responsibility fer her. Her husband died an he asked me ta take care 'a her. She needed me, her kids needed me an' we're a family now. I shoulda told ya Fi, I jus' didn't wanna hurt ya." He explained and Fiona nodded, she understood but it still hurt.

"Yeh want somethin other than ta check in, don' ya Filip?" She asked and Chibs nodded. He knew she'd see right through him, she'd always been able to.

"Yer right Fi, I'm sorry ta come ta ya like this but it was better than askin' ya on the phone." He took Fiona's hand in his and made sure her eyes met his. "I need a divorce Fi."

"What? How can ya ask me fer that Filip? We were married by a priest, in the eyes a' God. It's a sin ta divorce." She exclaimed as she pulled her hands from his with hurt, pain and anger fleeting across her face and Chibs wanted to take her into his arms but thought better of it so he just pushed on.

"It's also a sin to have a baby outta wedlock. Milla's havin' my baby Fi. I don' wan' it ta be a bastard." He told her and Fiona looked stricken as she processed what he'd told her.

"A baby? Yeh got her pregnant? Yeh wanted this didn' ya?" She asked and Chibs continued with honesty.

"I'm not gonna lie Fi, I love her an' I'm happy about this baby. It wasn't planned but we love it." He answered honestly and Fiona took a deep breath and let it out slowly as she absorbed what he said.

"Yeh told Kerri yet?" Fiona asked and Chibs shhok his head.

"I wanted to talk to ya first." He explained and Fiona nodded, understanding his point. "I know it's a big decision Fi but I want ya ta think about what this means to the baby."

"I need ta think on this Filip. Tell me about Milla. I wanna see how yeh feel about her." She requested and he started telling her about the woman he loved. He told her about how he'd been charged with Milla's protection and how he'd grown to love her far beyond the obligation he had to her and about how they'd formed a family and became strong together and as he told their story Fiona watched the love brighten his eyes and realized that this wasn't a midlife crisis or a man living up to his obligation. He was honestly in love with her and excited about having a baby with her. When she saw tears in his eyes as he showed her the sonogram picture her decision was made. There was only one thing she could do.

"Yeh really love them all don' yeh?" She asked and when he nodded she continued. "I reckon we need ta talk ta some people."

Chibs looked into Fiona's eyes and saw the resignation in them. She was going to grant him the divorce. He smiled brightly at her before he wrapped his arms around her and squeezed tight.

"Thank ya Fi." He kissed the top of her head and Fi smiled as tears leaked from her eyes. She loved him and always would but they were different people now with different lives and cutting him loose would be the best thing to do. It would also be the hardest.

…

_Two Weeks Later..._

Milla held her stomach as a new wave of cramps moved through her abdomen. Whatever drug the doctors had given her was certainly working and she felt another wave of liquid vacate her lower body. As she thought about why she was cramping she pressed her lower stomach again and felt a fresh wave of tears roll down her cheeks. She felt so empty, the emotional pain was so much worse than any of the physical pain. Her baby was gone and her heart was broken. As she cried she heard shouting from the hallway in a familiar Scottish brogue A few seconds later Chibs burst through the door. He looked livid but his face changed to loving in a heartbeat.

"Oh _mo graidh_." Chibs said before he walked to the bed and knelt beside her. As he took her hand she looked away. "Wha' happened?"

"I'm so sorry Chibs. I...I don't know how it happened. I was just sitting at home, sewing patches on Espy's Brownie sash and I felt a bad pain in my stomach. It was bad but not bad enough to stop what I was doing, then it happened ten minutes after and again. I felt some wetness and when I investigated there was blood on my hands. I called Chantal and she brought me here. The doctors aren't telling me anything. I'm so sorry." She started crying in earnest and Chibs took her chin and turned her face to look at him.

"Ya have nothin' to be sorry about darlin', I know ya loved this baby an' ya wanted it. I know ya didn' do anythin'. I love ya an' when yer ready we'll try again." He pressed his forehead against hers before he kissed her gently. "I love ya so much_ mo graidh_."

"I love you too." Milla whispered as she kissed him, then moved over and Chibs got the point and crawled into bed with her and held her.

"Jus' rest lovely. We'll get through this." He pulled her into his arms and kissed her gently. It hurt that their child was gone but they'd survive. They'd already survived too much to give up.

…

_Two Years Later..._

"Please Chantal?" Milla practically begged as her friend shook her head.

"No, I bought you two tests, I'm not buying you five." Chantal put her foot down and Milla clutched her hands.

"Please, I need to be sure. After last time I need to be completely sure so I can go to the doctor. I love you." Milla pleaded and Chantal sighed before ducked her head.

"Fine, I'll go." She squeezed Milla's hands before she hightailed it out of the kitchen. As soon as she was alone Milla leaned on the counter and breathed deeply for a few moments. She couldn't believe it was happening again. She might be pregnant with his baby and the thought made her smile even as the nerves turned her stomach. While she breathed she felt arms snake around hr and she leaned into her man.

"Hello lovely, I missed ya." Chibs whispered as he dropped a kiss to her shoulder and pulled her closely.

"You just saw me an hour ago." She smiled as his hand moved over her stomach.

"I still missed ya. Did ya get a test?" He asked s he passed his hand over her stomach again and Milla entwined her fingers with his.

"Chantal got me two, and I sent her out for more. I'm making her take them with me." She smiled and he chuckled into her hair.

"Ya think Phil's boys've been swimmin?" He asked and Milla nodded.

"All the signs are there, we both just need confirmation." She told him and he grinned.

"Tell me as soon as ya know. I wan' my birthday ta be the best yet." He grinned and Milla turned around to pull him to her.

"I want it to be too." She grinned and kissed him passionately, she loved her man and she already loved this new gift he'd given her.

…

_Seven Months Later..._

"Ok Milla, we're ready to go to the OR now." Dr. Nior said as she entered the room and Milla shook her head.

"I need my husband here. I need him." She begged and Chelsea came over to take her hand, her presence required since Chantal was on bed rest and couldn't be there for her and Gillian was in Canada with Koz so Chelsea was her emotional support..

"It'll be fine Milla, Chibs will be here to hold the baby, that's what matters." She said and a tear rolled out of the corner of her eye.

"I wanted this one to be different." She said sadly, referring to the fact that Juice hadn't been physically present for the birth of either of their children.

"What d'ya wanna be different _mo graidh_?" At the sound of Chibs' voice Milla looked up to see her husband dressed in a ridiculous hospital gown with his long locks in a cap and she was sure his boots were stuffed into a pair of paper booties.

"Nothing, I'm just so happy you're here." She reached her other hand out and he took it.

"Ok, let's go meet your child." Dr. Nior said with a smile and they began to prep Milla for surgery while Chibs continued to hold her hand. When he said his vows he'd promised to be with her in good times and bad and this was definitely good.

…

"Can I hold her Mama?" Espy asked from her seat on the window ledge.

"Sure but Ellie has to be there with you." Milla told her daughter as she reluctantly handed over the newest member of the household.

"What name did you decide on Mom?" Ellie asked and Milla and Chibs shared a look before he answered.

"Mauve Gloria Telford. We named 'er after our grans." He told his children as he grinned widely. They looked so perfect crowded together and his eyes misted.

"Oh my, you're all so beautiful." Mila smiled as Darlene, the official Club photographer and Rat's old lady walked in with her man and automatically got on one knee to take a picture of the kids who grinned as they happily displayed their new little sister. "Kids, go to your Mom and Dad, we need a family picture."

"No, I look awful, all puffy and red faced." Milla protested and Chibs leaned down to kiss her.

"No ya don' _mo graidh_, yer the most beautiful woman I know an' I want a family picture." He told her with a wide, happy smiled and Milla couldn't protest.

"You heard the Pres, let's get a picture." Milla ordered and all of the kids moved to her bed and situated themselves while Ellie held Mauve and they all grinned madly while pictures were snapped. After the pictures were taken Mauve fussed and needed feeding so they left the room to give them privacy. Once Milla was alone she uncovered her breast and fed her baby. As a tear landed on little Mauve's cheek Milla brushed it away before she kissed her daughter's head.

"Welcome to the world little Mauve. You've inherited the wildest, craziest, most loyal and loving family in the world and we'll all kill for you and die for you. All we ask is that you love us in return." She kissed her daughter again then continued to smile. "I love you baby, you're my gift.

* * *

…

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hello all, thank you for reading and reviewing my work,. I'm so glad you're giving me a chance to explore this new situation. Unfortunately, this journey is coming to a close and the next chapter may be the last. This has been wonderful and I'm so glad that I've had this chance to shake the cobwebs loose in my brain and share the resulting work with you. Thank you! .


	7. The End is the Beginning

**I own nothing that you recognize. All original characters and storylines are my own.**

**The End is the Beginning**

"_Mo graidh_? Ya up?" Chibs called as he came through the door in the mudroom. The house was quiet, which was to be expected at two o'clock in the morning, but he knew Milla would still be up. His meeting with Alvarez had gone too long and he was just glad to be home. He took off his cut and boots and went to the kitchen. He knew Milla would have left him something to eat and he was starving. He saw light under the doorway and walked in, only to see his very angry wife on her knees on the kitchen floor scrubbing.

"If you want food it's in the fridge." She told him brusquely as she got back up on her knees and dropped her brush in the bucked at her side before she grabbed a sponge.

"Wha' happened?" He asked and Milla glared.

"Your dog happened. Wallace got into the red velvet cake I made for Mauve's birthday, ate it and most of the cupcakes. Then he proceeded to vomit and experience violent, explosive diarrhea on the floor. I've been cleaning for a good three hours now and the red won't come out." Milla told him as she barely paused for a breath and Chibs schooled his face to hide his grin.

"Where's the pup now?" He asked and Milla took a spray bottle from her side and sprayed the pink on the floor, her face still angry.

"On the deck, Kenny put him in the travel kennel with a blanket. Don't worry, your baby boy is fine." Milla glared at her husband who got down on his knees in the kitchen and took one of the extra sponges and started cleaning a particularly red spot.

"I'm sorry lovely. Why don' ya go upstairs and take a bath? I'll have the prospects come by and scrub in the morning." He offered and Milla stood and stretched.

"Sounds like a good idea but I feel more like having a shower. Join me?" She asked and Chibs got up from the floor. Leave it to his woman to give him a reward when his dog was the reason she was pissed.

…

"You look so beautiful." Milla smiled as she helped Ellie into her prom dress. It was this complicated corseted contraption made of black satin and red lace. A little provocative but part of the reason Milla let her get the thing was the fact that it was twice as hard to remove as it was to put on.

"Come on Mom, I'm not beautiful." Ellie blushed, still unwilling to take a compliment.

"Wrong, you're my Elliedoll and you're beautiful. You have your Mom's beautiful eyes, your Dad's smile. I know you rarely saw it but he had a great smile. You and Kenny are the perfect blend of both of them and they're watching you right now, beaming with pride. Just like Chibs and I are." Milla wiped a tear that had fell on her cheek and Ellie turned around to hug her.

"I love you Mom." Ellie whispered and Milla squeezed her tightly.

"I love you too, now let's get this on you so we can freshen your makeup and get your shoes on." Milla let go and took a deep breath before she had Ellie turn around so she could finish up with the dress.

Soon enough Ellie was all dressed and on her way downstairs to her boyfriend. Milla was ahead of her and smiled as she saw Chibs, Phil and Hap standing in a semicircle around Will Hale, Ellie's boyfriend and Jacob Hale's youngest child. Milla liked the boy well enough. He was respectful and treated Ellie like a precious jewel but he was still a boy, with a penis, and her mambear instincts didn't like that being around her precious baby

"Hello Will." Milla greeted as she got off the last step and Chibs moved back to let her into the semi circle. She looked back and saw Ellie talking to Espy so it was her chance to speak her peace so she moved closer to him and gave him a hug. As she hugged him she whispered in his ear. "Show her a good time tonight but keep your hands to yourself. I like you, don't fuck that up."

She smiled sweetly as she moved away from Will and inserted herself into her husband's side. Ellie finished her path and hugged Will who was brave enough to hug her back while her parents watched on, proud of the beautiful girl they'd raised. A few minutes later they were standing outside the den while Darlene took pictures of the couple from every conceivable angle. Too soon it was time for them to leave and Milla stood out on the porch and watched the limo Will rented for the evening drive off. She felt tears in her eyes but held them in until the kids were gone, then all bets were off. As she dabbed her eyes Chibs came behind her and kissed her head as he held her.

"Who'd a' thought seven years ago that we'd be seein' our girl go ta the prom? With a Hale?" He asked and Milla chuckled and he continued. "Ya did so well _mo graidh_. Ya raised 'er strong an' smart. She's gonna make it because a' you."

"It wasn't just me babe, it was us. We raised her right and built a strong family." She turned around and rose on her tiptoes and kissed him. "I love you."

"Come on, we promised the kids some junk food and stories. We can' disappoint 'em." He told her before he kissed her then she unwound her arms and began to move toward the house. Before she got through the door he grabbed her wrist and pulled her to him. "Love ya."

…

_One Year Later..._

"It's really done? All of it?" Milla asked as she crawled behind Chibs on the bed and draped her arms across his shoulders.

"Aye, no more guns, no drugs an' no more pussy. We're legit now." He said as he took a breath, then let it out. "This is good fer us _mo graidh_, good fer our family."

"You don't need to convince me babe. I know this is best for all of us." She kissed his cheek before she moved back and started rubbing his shoulders. "So how're the other charters transitioning?"

"We're having some problems with SAMBEL, but they'll be comin around. We're legit now but it'll be awhile before the transition is complete." He rolled his shoulders under her hands before she moved forward and ran her hands down his chest.

"Wanna fool around? Get more of this stress out?" She asked and Chibs moved far quicker than a man his age should have and pinned her to the bed.

"Yeh're gonna be the death of me woman." He growled before he brought his mouth to hers. She might be the death of him but it would be a damn fine way to go.

…

"This what ya want?" Happy asked Milla as she sat on a chair by the pool table with her shirt rolled up to her shoulder and she looked at Chibs and grinned.

"Yeah, I'm sure." She told him confidently and he looked at Chibs.

"You still want this done bro?" Happy asked for permission from his President and friend who nodded.

"Aye, I want my mark on 'er an' I want 'er mark on me." He told Hap as he pointed to a spot on his chest where Happy was going to mark him with Milla and Mauve's names.

"A'ight." Hap said before there were no more words spoken as he inked a switchblade with Chibs' name on the blade. It had been a long time coming but Milla felt it was only right to get her man's name on her. She'd only recently gotten rid of the last marks Juice had left behind so it felt right to do it.

As soon as she was done Chibs took her vacated chair and she sat next to him while she watched Hap ink her name on her man's skin and felt pride. He'd linked her name with Mave's on Chibs' chest and put two entwined rings on the top. It was perfect and as they laid in bed once the tats were done they spent a lot of time studying each other. Proud to wear each other's mark.

...

_One Year Later..._

"I've been thinking..." Milla started to speak but her voice trailed and Chibs looked up from his saddlebag to raise an eyebrow.

"Tha's never good...What were ya thinkin' _mo graidh_?" He asked and Milla smiled as she crossed the room and pressed her body close to his.

"I was thinking that since things are going so well for us and for the Club that now would be the perfect time to try for another baby. I want another child with you." She explained as she ran her hands down his chest and he smiled before he kissed her gently and held her hands in his.

"When I get home we'll talk about it lovely." He kissed her again before the sound of bikes rumbling outside got his attention. "I've gotta go. Kiss Mauve goodnight fer me an' give Espy an' Robby hugs. Tell 'em all I love 'em"

"You got it, love you." She kissed him again before he moved away, grabbed his stuff and went down the stairs. Once he was gone Milla sat on the bed and smiled. They'd have another baby soon and the thought made her almost giddy. Her life had turned from shit into something great and soon it would be even better.

…

Milla sat on a chair in her daughter's dorm room and dabbed at her eyes. She didn't want Ellie to see her tears and think she was upset. Yes, she was sad to see her daughter leave home but she was also insanely proud of what Ellie had accomplished. To think a girl from her upbringing would get a scholarship to Stanford University to study Pre-Law was astounding.

"Hey, Mom, Cherise wants to take me to the coffee kiosk. Is it ok if I go?" Ellie asked as she poked her head in the door and Milla smiled as she stood.

"Of course it's ok baby, you want me to do anything since the prospects have pretty much everything unpacked and set up?" She asked her daughter and Milla shook her head.

"No, Mom, you've done so much already. I'll be back soon, then we can go out to lunch before the orientation." Ellie told her as she smiled wide.

"Sounds great sweetheart, have fun getting to know your roommate." Milla told her before Ellie's blond head disappeared again. As Milla moved to the bed to finish making it her phone rang and she smiled as she answered. "Hey you."

"Hello lovely, how're things with Ellie?" Her husband asked and Milla sat on the bed.

"It's good, Ellie's got a pretty nice room and she's getting along with her roommate. None of the prospects fucked up so everything should be fine." She told him as her smile turned sad when she found a picture of the kids with Donna and Opie and her heart hurt.

"How're you holdin' up?" Her man asked and Milla chuckled. Leave it to him to see beyond her facade.

"I'll be fine but it's hard. I just don't know how I'll handle it when it's time to leave her here." She told her husband who chuckled.

"Yeh'll survive darlin'. Jus' remember how proud ya are of 'er." He told her and Milla smiled widely.

"How do you always know how to make me feel better?" She asked and Chibs chuckled.

"Because I love ya. Now go on an' finish helpin' Ellie, then come home. We still have a baby we need ta make." He said and after that they said their goodbyes and Milla did as she was told. She did as much unpacking as she could while she waited for her daughter. It was going to be hard to say goodbye but she could do it, especially since her baby had earned it.

…

_One Year Later..._

"What happened with Espy?" Milla asked as she stood at the island in the middle of the kitchen and transferred the cookies to the cooking rack. and Chibs sat down at the table with Mauve on his lap.

"I told ya, she beat up a boy fer callin' Robby a nigger an' sayin ya didn' know who his Da is. She's got in-school suspension." He explained and Milla moved to the sink and washed her hands before she joined her husband and babygirl at the table.

"I know what happened baby. What I want to know is what you think happened to her today that made her go nuts. Normally, she just verbally beats down the kids." Milla explained and Chibs leaned down and kissed his daughter's dark hair.

"I guess the little bastard's been on this all week. Espy says he's got a beef with her because she's smarter than him." He told her and Milla sighed.

"Makes sense, his family's filled with elitist douches. Robby heard what happened." Milla told her husband who raised his eyebrow and she continued. "He's surprisingly ok about it. I guess he got that ladback thing from Juice. He did ask if I felt sorry enough to get him a subscription to National Geographic though."

Chibs chuckled with his wife while Mauve looked between her laughing parents with a confused look on her face. She looked so cute that Milla moved forward and planted a kiss on her cheek before she moved up to kiss her husband gently.

"I told him we'd get him the magazine and take him to the museum Sunday. What do ya say Daddy?" She asked him and Chibs smiled.

"I say we better go Saturday. The sea life exhibit is only open 'til then." He told her and Milla nodded.

"Sounds great." She continued to smile at her husband and they chatted for a while longer before Milla left to help Robby with his homework and talk to Espy about what happened.

While Mila talked to their daughter Chibs took Mauve into the den and set her up in the corner with toys while he watched some tv and enjoyed a cigarette. He smiled to himself as Mauve started playing with her tiny Dyna and settled back into the cushions. He never thought he'd ever be this content with his life. He had a good family, a good woman and he didn't have to fight and scrabble to survive. This was his dream and now he was living it.

...

_Three and a Half Months Later..._

"Hey baby." Milla greeted her husband softly as he entered the hospital room. "Meet your son."

Chibs didn't say anything as he walked to the bed and kissed his wife's forehead before he kissed his son's. He gave her a smile then took a deep breath before he could speak.

"How're ya doin? I'm sorry I wasn't here fer ya." He apologized and Milla smiled at him and shook her head.

"No need to be. We're both healthy and your son is strong. Looks like he got more from you than your name." She smiled and Chibs kissed her before he took his son in his arms and held him.

"Ya hear that m'boy? Yer Ma thinks yer like me. I don' know how good that'll be in the long run but I'll try my best to live up ta it, ta be a good Da and ta make ya proud ta have the name Filip James Telford." He told little Fillip Jr. as he kissed his head again. "I love ya son."

He felt his eyes mist up as he looked at his son then the tears fell as he moved his eyes to Milla who was sniffling quietly from her spot on the bed. He moved further up the bed and moved his hand to Milla's face while she pressed her cheek against his palm and smiled through her tears. Ten years ago she thought her life was over, that nothing was ever going to be good again but he had proved her wrong. With his help she'd moved past her pain and they'd built a life together. A life she dreamed of when she was thirteen and fell in love with a gruff, but kind, Scotsman. As her tears stopped she ran a hand over her son's head and looked at her husband, her eyes shining with emotion.

"I love you baby." She whispered as she placed her hand on his and he turned his smile to her. His eyes said it all and as he moved to kiss her Milla sighed in contentment. This life had been her dream so long ago and now she was living it.

…

**Author's Note:** Now the story is at an end and I want to thank you all for reading and reviewing. This story was a way of going outside my comfort zone and your positive response encouraged me so much. There's so much going on in Sutterland that my head is spinning as an author so having you all for inspiring me and allowing me to explore this story. I hope you all enjoyed it and, again, thank you all for reading and reviewing my work. I do what I do thanks to all of you.


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